I'm filth, no other word to describe it.
These days are just to small
To consider another love beside me.
I'm evil, towards those close to me
I don't mean to be
You see its what man made me.
I'm cold hearted
When we were parted.
Frustrated
Contemplated
Wheather i was good enough to live.
A bastard to my blood
But then they should'nt thud
Thud me in the back
And watch me stack
On to my knees
And watch me beg 'please'.
You see i never thought any different
From when i was young
'Cause you see
I was still scum.
I was scum to my mum,
Lying about anything and everything
But she could'nt see me aching.
Aching from a broken heart
All the way from the start.
Oh so now you see mum
See what i've become,
For you have your eyes open
And you could'nt smell the bacon.
I have not come very far
I still have the scar
The scar that was left behind
And how you were so blind.
Blind and unknown to my scars
When will you realise i'm not a liar.
For now i cannot see
Where god wants me to be,
To be condemned
Coz it was my mayhem.
Maybe god wants me gone
Maybe my mum should've used a baton
To finish off what her dad started
Which became us, parted.
Author notes
Partly about my abuse and my mum.
This is my pre-write my other poem i entered is 'Meat i am...'
A contest entry
- Silent All These Years (for rape and sexual assault survivors) by SerenityNChains.
1750 points, ended November 9, 2008, 44 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
what do you think about this poem? :f
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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all I can say is amazing. The loose form is great, but the words simply bite. Wow. My blessings your way
Serene
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Thankyou
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This is such an incredible piece, you are so brave. Thankyou very much for entering this poem.
~*~DramaQueen469~*~ -
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It is so true; how difficult it is to move past abuse and let yourself be as a 'normal' person in relation to relatioships, and intimacy, and other affections. And I have no advise to give for I myself haven't managed to find the answer to that quest yet ... I only wish that soemday you will find a person for you
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Awwww thanks..... I thought i did, turned out that wern't the case.
As pur usual.
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just let me tell you one thing dear... YOU ARE NOT SCUM! I don't want you to believe anyone who tells you they are... you are a wonderful person... all you need to is feel better about yourself. You are a good person. You write wonderfully!
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Awww thanks..... It's just a feeling i had to express coz u feel dirty after it's happened....
Thanks for commenting on my poem.
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totly forced rhyme...
thought rhythem is kept
ur story is a little confusing...
not wat i'm looking 4 thanx n-e ways -
That was amazing. Painful and moving. I loved it.
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Thankyou for reading my work.
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Wow, this was a very powerful piece. I wish you all the best, no one should have these feelings. Good luck in the contest. :]
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Thanks
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gosh very powerfull. im sorry to see you hurting like this but congratulate you on having the strentgh to write it down and share it with us.
very very powerfull
take care and good luck in the contest xx and if you ever want to speak i am willing to listen to you xx
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what do you know much about abuse?
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Thanks for commenting. Ive had my fair share of pain through the years. And thankyou for offering me your support. xx
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