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Perspective

I come from a

legacy of substitutions.

 

I know you,

better than most;

I am the scratch to

your neverending itch.

 

I am a replacement

of a replacement,

and after I am spent,

another will pledge our sorority.

 

It is a long lineage—

a sisterhood of addiction,

each one of us lined up,

pretty maids in a row,

toppled among your  

ginfucked, unanswered prayers.

 

When each morning retch leaves you

screaming to your   

holyfuckingmotherofgod,

and the next round

leaves you a dry little manworm

in the bottom of

all that is empty,

remember this--

 

she may have left you limp,

but I never will.

 

A contest entry

critical comments welcomed

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • kyew
    May 27
    Edit | Reply
    this one seemed a good one to read considering our exchange about perspective previously.

    I'm not sure I got all of it but I think there's a bit of anger in there with some irony and sarcasm. the whole thing about addiction really speaks loudly to me - I just quit smoking about a month ago and that was my last (and worst) addiction. it's kind of angsty and raw. powerful in that way.


  • zochit2me gold member
    October 6, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This is absolutely fan-freaking-tastic!
    No other way to describe it.
    I will pick my jaw up and move along dumbfounded...saying
    holyfuckingmotherofgod


    ♥Becky♥


    • Saffron gold member
      October 6, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      thank you so much--what a great compliment

      Saffron


  • Papabear 4 Rosered
    September 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Very powerful

    I don't care who inspired it. I don't care what style it is in. I know what I like and i like that.


  • Night Hope gold member
    September 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply



    Gorgeous, overflowing with knowledge & profound wisdom. You've done him justice & honored yourself, as well. Congratulations on winning top honors, Lady.

     

    *homage*

     

     

     


    • Saffron gold member
      September 4, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Wanda, thank you from the bottom of my heart

      Saffron


  • MuddyKing
    September 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    well I've read it through a few times and it has that essence
    funny thing in this contest bronze is the real winner
    and I have to say this one is bronze worthy
    we know this was never about points or trophies, that's why it was done this way
    Scott is one helluva writer and I knew no one could equal his way
    although if anyone came close it was you and this fine piece
    peace and hugs Muddy

    • Saffron gold member
      September 4, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Holy shit! I truly never expected this. I can't possibly thank you enough, or tell you how much these means to me, on so many levels right now. You absolutely rock, and Scott has a wonderful friend in you.



      Saffron


  • tara wilson gold member
    September 4, 2008
    Edit | Reply


  • tomisb
    September 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    The woman in this is so symbolic of what it means. Stunning language, hearth strong images.
    Peace & Light,
    Tom B.


  • Thomas Scott gold member
    September 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Fine piece, this.

    Love that opening line.

1 - 12 of 12