we were a prairie fire
lustful
and greedy
to consume each other.
licking away smooth virginity,
abusing the atmosphere
of us.
we were hungry
for future's horizon.
oxygen fueled our moaning brilliance
and we used each molecule.
unaware that to keep breathing,
to keep a fire beating,
for love to exist...oxygen is key.
with no more breath
the fire went out. leaving nothing
but a memory of warmth
Author notes
i didn't get as much time as i wanted to work on this,
with school starting and such...but i hope you all enjoyed it.
and please, if you didn't, tell me exactly why.
peace to all ~flight
A contest entry
- breathe by Namita.
800 points, ended October 16, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
honesty
Comments
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I really like this piece alot. It is solid. Personally I feel you could have left the last stanza off of this and still made a solid impact. It seems to weaken it a bit, but overall it's a goody
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ohh my god this is senusal.
i love the first line. i loveee itt
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thanks!
peace to all ~flight
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good to see your stuff again!
Salt
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