All the times before
you said that you were leaving
I never thought you'd leave me for another someones arms
but now you've gone and left me
drowning in my sorrows
living in a whiskey state of mind
(chorus)
With you there's no more tomorrow
just dreams of yesterday
those happy hours spent and loving every day
At home now on this barstool
where the wine and liquor flows
I spend my lonely nights 'til the morning comes along
my hand around a bottle
drowning in my sorrows
living in a whiskey state of mind
(chorus)
There'll be no more tomorrows
just whispers in the wind
and mem'ries of your laughing eyes in disappearing dreams
Though time for us is gone
and our world no longer turns
I can't forget your sweet caress the way you touched my skin
the loneliness and missing you
yet somewhere in what lays ahead
I'll learn to love again
(chorus)
'til then there's no tomorrow
just moments lost in time
the silence of a beating heart without you in my arms...
no stars to light the path I'm on
and no direction home (fade to close)
Author notes
A slow country song.
A contest entry
- Can't sing? Can write? Enter your songs here! by upperworld06.
700 points, ended March 23, 71 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - country lyrics group and others by poets whisper.
900 points, ended July 20, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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"'til then there's no tomorrow
just moments lost in time
the silence of a beating heart without you in my arms... " I like that a lot.
You might want to seperate the chorus from the rest of the write? Nice job and thank you for the entry. -
i can almost hear a steel guitar as i read these lyrics, there is so much sadness, and not even whiskey can wash it away, great song, best of luck in the contest
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definitly, spelled wrong i know, a good country song, as soon as i started reading it thats exactly how i viewed it. drowning in my sorrows
living in a whiskey state of mind
love that part, great job and thanks for entering -
I like this a lot
I'm a big fan of Johnny Cash's lyrics and this brought some of his songs to mind. The style is laconic and crisp but still manages to convey a lot of emotion. What gives this piece impact for me is that I can easily identify with the story teller as I'm sure a lot of others can. Sometimes you have to live it to write it. Excellent write. -
"There'll be no more tomorrows
just whispers in the wind
and mem'ries of your laughing eyes in disappearing dreams"
Tragically heartbreaking, and i love the use of "mem'ries" in a country style, very nicely done.
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I haven't written many lyrics but as a person who likes to make music and also listen to many different kinds I like this sad song. The emotions run strong throughout and I guess this is one lost love that is very much regretted. The bottle often features in such circumstances as a means of escape, which of course it is not, however this song is one I could well imagine hearing late night on one of the coutry slots on the radio. My favourite lines are:
There'll be no more tomorrows
just whispers in the wind
and mem'ries of your laughing eyes in disappearing dreams
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"There'll be no more tomorrows
just dreams of yesterday
those happy hours loving you until you went away"
Those three lies are my favorite part of the poem. They just speak out. Anyway, the ending left me a bit confused and wasn't too rock solid, I think you could have done a bit better with that. But over all, I think it's a great poem. Written very nicely and from a different point of view. [=
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seems
I and many others can relate. The bottle and the blues. Well don3
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I like it.. very well spoken.. er.. sang? haha. Thanks for the emotion in this piece =]
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moonshine...I have never drank on heartbreaks but I could almost want to drown myself in spirits...so as not to feel the pain...
felt this
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I bet you have an old dusty guitar in the corner, I can see you now, sitting on the porch serenading the dogs, when you could be star. If not for broken hearts, there would be no country western music. Nice one David!
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A good one, I think. I am no expert in lyrics. I like the poetic value of this and the sadness of the man in a "whisky State of Mind". I was there once but managed to get out.
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Superb plus
An excellent write, indeed. I think these are good lyrics; reminds me of lots of old country/western songs. Again well done. -
wow!
i liked this very much. it takes a telented poet to write a song, and you have blown this one away. let me know if it gets recorded. i'd like to hear it.
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I envy people who can write songs. I can't. You did a hell of a job with this one. Like it very much.
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