The War Necessary to Define Peace

I seemed to have woken with the pain of sand in my eyes.
And as I prepared to meet my God, I realised that maybe my tears knew more about this ancient desert entity than my soul may have let on.
As I outstretched my fingers like small magnets grasping, hoping to touch the firmament,the mood descended like millikons of large black anvils all stitched into the lining of the night sky, clammering ever closer to rest upon my insignificant shoulders.
"These are truely the last days!" spat forth from speakers in the distance. It seemed fitting...

My dreams had become floods of other people having sex in far off lands.
Heavy machinery roams the alien landscape, but who is driving it?
I never had wings but it feels like they were clipped.
Billboard insecurities, txt msg abbrev. and spam emails.
You have stolen one of my lungs.

LOL.ROFL. Death be thy secret identity; codename: internet.

How can living in this erected kingdom still be like drowning in a sand-filled egg timer?
Does the time for living allow the time for pain?
Is it part of the great test of strength and comprehension?
Instinct above all else.
Survival of the heartless.
Was God actually learning from Darwin?

If I can't relate to Him, would I be able to relate better to my fellow man?
I studied heavily and fell down hard into the dark well of expecting that they may be studying me!
Are any of us working towards the same goal?
Has the time in which I exist destroyed our hearts while we were sleeping?
Everything feels something at some time.
That certain shiver you get down the bony parts of your back or the tremors which stalk the pit of your stomach and come to settle like stones at the bottom of a lake.
We all feel like this within our lifetimes but it never seems to be at the same time or even in the same universe as anyone else.
I still have my faith in the vibration between you, me, them, him, her.
For a moment today I will sit and pat my dog and realise that he and his outlook on life may be simpler than mine and yours, but I will envy him for it.

Honesty? Sincerity?

Can you even trust my last sentence?

Can you even trust my last sentence?

Can you even trust my last sentence?

Can you even trust my last sentence?

For days my mind would wake me screaming like someone had set it on fire.
Other times it would whisper softly like a siren's call trying to lure me to my own demise.

"This is the war necessary to define peace. This is my LOVE. This bitterness is so much more than you. Hopelessness. Despair."

These demons had seemed to arise from the same dry, abyssic plains as the desert entity who's hands I had put myself to rest in.
The fear of sleep is a dangerous battle with many casualitys.
In the age of the neon flashing light, paranoia has become the cause of our collateral damage.

Hope? Trust? Lies can only flourish with belief.
Do a quick stock take of all the items graven on your words, thoughts and actions.
The best illusions have a certain element of truth.
Worst of all are the lies we force ourselves to believe and the reassurance of that we can get away with it forever.
There are streetlights concieved in my perception that burn brighter than that old neon sign.

Everything subconscious had the same survival like urge as the Darwinian deity to rise out of the gutter and reach for the heavens like never before.
The primal, pulsing momentum evolved like apes becoming men. Good men. Strong men.
My streetlights do not effect global warming, but serve to warm my heart.

So let the proclamation go forth that growth is the destroyer of the stagnation of our lives, served with a genuine good and necessary humilty.
Radiation limited to 1 square metre, though results may vary according to your individual circumstances.

Maybe this time, if even for just a moment I can truely believe we are free...