I stand upon the shore
where I have lived all my life.
I can still see the house that my husband built
when he was here.
By some miracle, it stands
unscathed by your siblings' assaults.
By cruel fate, I still stand
when I want to fall.
I beg of you,
turn your eye toward me
so that through it
I may see my love.
I beg of you,
wrap me in your deadly embrace
so that in it
I may find my love.
Please, tempest of the sea
take me.
Author notes
Not your contemporary prayer.
A contest entry
- APPEASE HURRICANES GUSTAV AND HANNA THROUGH YOUR PRAYERS by maa.
543 points, ended September 8, 2008, 4 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Turn those greenies into gold (or silver or bronze) #6 by whispernthedark.
700 points, ended September 27, 2008, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Hardely any metaphor, why is everyone entering dribble into my contest?! -
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I have removed my entry from your contest; I apologise.
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Your wishes come through loud & clear. Excellent words, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.
♥
whisper
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thank you for this truly heartfelt emotional prayer of despair ... indeed, this was a most unexpected response to the prompt, but I love surprises ... while almost everybody tends to pray for lives to be "saved", your voice wakes us up from our saviour-dream and shows us that a natural catastrophy (as well as illness, so-called accidents etc.) may represent welcome exit-doors for souls who suffer too much and who hope to get rid of their earthly burden through physical death ...
yet, I can see a very positive and enlightening dimension in your poem as well :
"turn your eye toward me
so that through it
I may see my love"
since in the eye of a hurricane there is only silence and no movement, I perceive your plea as a desire to find a state of peace, into which the ever-agitated mind has no entrance-ticket ...
I truly and sincerly wish you peace,
much love,
maa
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Not your contemporary prayer but a human's heartfelt plea all the same. SO very emotional, very deep, creative and unusual, very captivating to me. Best of luck, God bless you.
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very well written. great emotion was felt through your well chosen words. loved the earnest temptation through the imagery set forth through this piece.
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