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gnawed





You can only ache
in brilliant colors,

like a bleeding horizon
for my eyes only.


There seems to dance
minute portraits
within my mouth,
unhinging my jaw
endlessly.


I should really
be closing these lids,
but I've counted sacred
your petty expressions.


Music to me
is the duet of our breathing,
in tune to the rise and fall

of rusty rib cages.


I was waiting for
and have now found
the point where

I can taste you
on my lips

and smell you
in my clothes.


Your words
work themselves
into my veins,

until they're mine
and memorized.
They whisper
constantly
without cessation
or even pause.


And you've left me hearing them;
wearing you-
with your sweat
upon my skin.









Author notes


Option:
Quotes-
"I can taste you on my lips and smell you in my clothes" BUTTHOLE SURFERS

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Comments

  • evidently
    September 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I love this, but I think it's too long. I think the centre of it would be stronger if you cut out the hazy bits around the edges. Though that might just be me.

    I especially like: "You can only ache/in brilliant colours" (it expresses so much in such a simple, concrete way) and "I've counted sacred/your petty expressions."


  • Rock-Junkie
    August 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    niiice!! I really like the inspiration you took with this song quote. you did a good job with it. Favorite line: "music to me is the duet of our breathing". Great write and good luck in my contest!!