"What is this lump?
Oh God I hope it isn't...
What will I do if it is?
Have chemotherapy,
smoke marijuanna for the nausea,
live out my last years
as I wish I had.
Doing my personal list
of ten things to do before I die.
Oh God I hope it isn't...
Should I go to the doctor?
Yes, I'll make an appointment tomorrow.
But what if...
What if it IS the big 'C'?
What will I do then?
Why me?
This isn't fair.
I hope it's alright.
Tomorrow,
tomorrow I'll find out for sure.
Oh God I hope it isn't."
s.m.
Author notes
We all have a fearful voice. Do we dare listen to it, too much? How do we make it quieten?
In a list
A contest entry
- Write me a Monologue by Lauren Noir.
1000 points, ended October 11, 2008, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Share your voice with me
Comments
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I liked the fact it was the voice that sit there and taunts us in out head. I liked how real it was. This was really emotive and a little bit risky, so I appreciate this. The big C, that's such a clever way of putting it.
Welllll done.
-
I never had the big C as you have put it, though I lost a dear friend to it, scared the hell out of my watching her decline, cant really say what I'd do if were in her place.
I guess I wouldnt want to be, I live in a world of agony for a different reason, but after seeing that, I realized what im going through is nothing.
Your words pulled out some painful memories, yet, in the end it was still good to remember, the good times and the bad, your words had a sad echo to the reality many do face, and the thoughts fears and mixed emotions that must go through a persons mind.
Deeply emotional write.
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excellent~
I have the big C
And those same thoughts went through my mind when I found out about that first time..both my breast are gone..then mestastized from there to the colon...then the breast to lung...and they did a scope to remove that and now I have it in the bones....spine..some days I hurt so bad I cry in pain..and I am on the old chemo as well asked if I could quit they promptly told me no..so I am on it now until well you know...definitely no fun...I used to get out with hubby and do so much now I can barely go..I hate feeling like this...lifting groceries is agony for me so now I have someone do that...
This is powerful and thought provoking...
And this indeed is on the raw edges of life
Hugs
Susan~~~
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