The panoply of midnights half moon smile,
emblazed beneath her part drawn shutters,
captured my glances and pseudo beguile
so sweet nothings were just mumbled stutters,
and to the rhythm of her soft inhale
this heart I stitched to sleeve, shed comforts veil,
for although the breezes laid down their song
and played hypnotically upon my mind,
they could not break sensualities throng
as your beauty and thoughts became entwined.
So never more will my steps leave distance
between commitments shallow insistence.
A contest entry
- Sixains by cricketjeff.
1450 points, ended September 7, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Critique Requested
Comments
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A lovely poem
I would love to have read more stanzas but this short piece is enchanting. The imagery and thoughts behind it chime well with me, great stuff, well worth a "Not Bad"!
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well done, sir
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AMAZING..perfect flow and rhyme..
captured my glances and pseudo beguile
so sweet nothings were just mumbled stutters,
How do you do it?..definite trophy in my opinion..(yes, dear I have ALL THE CONFIDENCE in the world in you)..best of luck in the contest my dear friend....blessings..namaste..
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excellent - a tasty piece
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