A poesy lady happ'ly graces page
with words that play much like piano keys
With careful skill she does with ease upstage
the foolish one Aoide wants to please.
My poet's thoughts do race with passions speed
as pen is dipped in inkwell's surging blood.
This muse's frenzy shares inspired my need
that flows in genius, streamed in fertile flood.
As whirling pen dost sing in joyful delight
of filling space to sate this lover's soul.
The hours will fly fair into late of night.
Our fruitful union truly makes me whole.
In mind of quiet's rest she lays in arms
of lovers sharing many wondrous charms.
Aoide is one the original three Greek muses. She is the muse of music.
Copyright © Gregory Schrupp 1/14/09
Author notes
Aoide is one of the three original Greek muses. She is the muse of music.
English Sonnet
abab
cdcd
efef
gg
Iambic Pentameter
A contest entry
- Jeff's first year by cricketjeff.
4620 points, ended October 5, 2008, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A Contest for your Muse!!! -- by Florida Sunshine.
450 points, ended September 17, 2008, 34 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your absolute BEST! (1,009 points, winner takes all) by AutumnsFlame.
1858 points, ended December 5, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make this THE largest Contest EVER on AP [enter, enter, enter!] by Symphony.
18000 points, ended April 28, 1014 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My 5 year anniversary at AP! Something to move me by MightyBoosh.
550 points, ended January 18, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Form Rounds Contest - Qualifying Round - Sonnet (prewrite) by Little Eagle.
600 points, ended March 3, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 35 of 35
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Sexual, sensual...
very erotic! Thank you for the cold shower. lol!
bb
)O(
db
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hmm sounds like she means something to you
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Thank you for your entry
I used to have a group for muses. Poetic Muse I think it was. Though the greek muse that I identified with was one of writing. Nice word usage.
Good job on the form. I don't know how many syllables Aoide is, I read it as three and if it is three then you are over the syllable count in a line or two, but I can't be certain so I won't fault you for it. Nice rhyme scheme and good rhythm
I encouage you to keep writing to read and comment.
You have been chosen to proceed to the next round. Once the next round contest is up you will receive a link to that contest.
God Bless
Tammy
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You are right on the name!
Aoide is three syllables.
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Is this a sonnet? It was beautifully written, i love sonnets
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Beautifully written; the second sonnet that I have read in this contest today - and it's just as well done; there's a real 'old time' attractiveness about the way that you wrote this -
And not only that, I love the topic matter; she sounded so personal to you, like someone you knew, and had in your life day in day out - only to find she is Greek lady of Music ; very well crafted that was!
No criticism here; it was a pleasant read of such longing but joy within it; all gleeful... Thank you for sharing, and for entering
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Excellent
A sonnet so beautiful and heart-filling,
I never till now read,
So deep and with love filled,
thine words do portray,
a write so very fair. ((I'm not one for rhymes, but I DO hope you get the message
))
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NICE!!! Your rhyme and structure were absolutely perfect and you used some colorful wording here! This is probably the best thing I have read all day. Thank you for entering my contest.
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wow:)
You created an amazing picture to me...i enjoyed every line.so touching and full of emotions...thanks for sharing!excellent work
for such remarkable writing!
juliet
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Beauteously done. I love that you used a muse. I don't think their as used as they should be. And better still, you knew who it was, instead of just calling it your muse.
At the same time, I wish I knew more about her from your piece. Perhaps, it's more that I desire it, and will end up going to look her up later on. -
This has an antique edge to it. Rich in the fervor of creativity ('grace', 'piano keys', careful skill', surging,' 'frenzy'.....), it's clever in that you turned the muse into the embodiment of your desire...both the source and fuel of your inspiration.
The last two lines are creative yet moving...and possibly ironic in that she has more than one lover.
The flow is steady, and I enjoyed your use of old English.
Very satisfying.
Mordegast
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A lovely Shakespearean sonnet, with excellent meter and rhyme.
Thanks a lot for the entry, this is a really tough contest to judge!
Which is what I wanted!
Thanks again
Jeff
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lovely done!
true soft spot in my heart for sonnet writers,
i admire the discipline and flow of heart!
wonderful is this Aiode to enjoy,
the imagery was lovely indeed!
well done bold warrior, well done!
flamesdragoness
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I second Sue's comment! This sonnet was a joy to read!
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You do the sonnet form proud. Your muse must have guided your hand and mind to write this one. A joy to read.
Congratulations on the trophy, well deserved.
Sue
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Bandit appreciation!
Thank you for contributing to The Poetic Bandits reading list
~Lilac
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Loooooooovely
this is SUCH a hard form! I loved the way you took it and put musicallity into it, it made me smile from the heart.
I really enjoyed the imagary, it was precice but gave us an over all picture, and wasn't contrvied by the form.
I'm not a fan of the background and I would have loved a musical link in the last too lines, but they were really beautiful. Music is LOVE
Well done
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Oh, I loved the name ~ it is totally fitting with the muse ~ you've penned an awesome poem. The rhyme is well written. Well enough it doesn't pull the attention from the overall write ~ Excellent job!
Your poem does meet the requirements of the contest, it was my pleasure to read and review your work,
Best of luck to you,
Florida Sunshine
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Cool, I like the muses. I haven't been able to find much information on any of the muses. I looked through several books.
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Check Wikkipedia and then google the three main ones.
There is quite a mythology to the first three. Then 9 more were added. If you use 'Aoide' as your search, you should connect to all info.
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You left me a few wonderful comments so I simply had to come to your house to see who you are. I’m so impressed! I had no idea you were a Sonneteer and a good one at that. I love the message this depicts and the meter is fluid. Most every line is in decasyllable and the Volta is subtle but defined. Bravo!
Love,
Amera♥
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Thank you Amera
Knowing your skills, I appreciate that beautiful comment. It means much to get respect from those who you respect as a poet. I also want to say I love your 'dancing girl'. I can't stop watching her.
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This is a beautiful poem about Aoide I don't know much about sonnet forms - but this read smoothly and was a joy to let my mind slip through your words with all the beautiful imagery that they portray I wish you the best in the contests!
Keep writing
Polly
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Hey, that's not badly done, y'know!
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I enjoyed this first time round..made me do my homework. I just love the feel sonnets bring to a poem.
Love ~sweetness~ xxx
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Sorry, I thought you hadn't seen it
Thanks for giving it a reread. I having lots of senior moments, recently. My memory is really failing. -
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LOL!!! I just have blonde ones
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I loved the last two lines, truly what a muse should be. I also liked the line "Again, shall we in oneness become whole" because of the interesting phrasing and the idea behind the words. Cheers
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I very much enjoy sonnets, and I'm developing an appreciation for mythically-inspired pieces as well. It is a beautiful dance that you've described, that of muse and poet intertwined.
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Love the imagery in this poem, especially the opening stanza! It not only implies a comparison to playing the piano keys but the deftness associated with both actions. Love it!
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Thank you for this wonderful comment!
It put a large smile on my face.
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i liked this the last two stanzas are my personal favorite tho i also like the 2nd stanza to because the way it describes surges
XD
so i like and i am off to read your other new poems ^-^
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Interesting start. I read on to see if the lady gives her words, or if your words are in this manner offered to her! I wonder about her motivations, as she skillfully "upstage[s]" one that she "wants to please." Is it the lady or her sweetheart that finds him/himself "foolish"? Ah! But love can make fools of either!
Pacing definitely picks up with "thoughts do race with passion's speed" and "muse's frenzy." Excellent "pen is dipped in inkwell's surging blood!"
Third stanza brings to mind the role of correspondence in love, as in Cyrano de Bergerac.
Nicely rhymed, with some visual rhyme in the first stanza. Thanks for the Author notes. I am unfamiliar with the title word. Is "Aoide" the name of the admired lady, or reference to something else?
Best of luck!
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Melting to the heart!
a Sonnet writer...they truly have the power to
relinquish our hearts don't they!
My goodness, that was a treasure to read!
Smartly written and feasts of imagery to enjoy!
Humble bow and raising of the Silver sword to
honor your passions muse released!
flamingdragoness
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One of the three original muses...a wonderful feel to it..flows beautifully. There is a warmth and love to this that warms the heart and is quite uplifting...a pleasure to read as always. Good luck in the contest with this hon.
Love ~sweetness~ xxx
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