At the end of a rainbow
there are many things I would like to find
I would like to know if the stories are true
that I have heard in so many old folk tales and rhymes
Is there really a little green man
and a huge pot of gold to claim?
even if there was
I don't think I would take it
because it just wouldn't be the same
A trip to the end of a rainbow
must be a long journey
one man will never see
and one we will never see in person.
At the end of the rainbow
which side is the best view?
the one with the green grass growing
or the side with the sunshines glow?
Its a young girls dream
to travel upon the rainbow
to find that their hopes and dreams
really really
do come true
At the end of the rainbow
what could we find?
Dreams
long lost lovers
money
fame
friendship
love
peace
and
hope?
But to get this beautiful image
to display upon sunny skies
it has to run acrossed trouble
to show its beauty to our eyes
A long needed storm
to quinch our parched grounds thirst
and then the sun dries the rain mist
to show its colors at its best.
We all have storms in our life
to only help us grow
into beautiful aspiring creatures
and shine within the rainbows glow
At the end of the rainbow
there isn't much I would like to find
may be just the very fact
to know what was on the other side
May be I would like to find my true love
and kiss in the rainbows glow
to find the answers to all my questions
that I really would like to know
May be I would like to see lifes one true mystery
and make it to the other side
and bask in the fame
for discovery
May be I don't want to know
what is on the other side
for fear of losing the beauty
of the mystery inside
Some things are better left unknown
like the beauty of the rainbow
and the secrets
left un-told.
A contest entry
- At The End Of The Rainbow (Rhyme Only) by passim.
1500 points, ended September 15, 2008, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
please give me your honest opinion on what you truly think of this piece I will return the favor...*muah* (redhanded)
Comments
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What a great write. I have to agree that if we find out what's at the end of the rainbow that it will lose it's mystry.
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I love the last two stanzas and I think you may have a good point there. Once we find out what is at the end of the rainbow, we lose the mystery. Thank you, lovely poem
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I think this is an excellent take on the prompt! I love the questioning, if one did find the tip of the rainbow, would they really want to know and would they accept that answer? wow, really made me think. you did a great job with the imagery and, though I think you told rather than showed the story you intended to weave, I still think it does its job wonderfully.
I do have a couple things that might help: the contest calls for rhyme and while you manage to do this with grace and, it looks like, a lot of work, there are a few stanzas that don't quite make it. For example, the ninth stanza:
"A long needed storm
to quinch our parched grounds thirst
and then the sun dries the rain mist
to show its colors at its best."
(umm, 'quinch' should be 'quench,' and thirst doesn't rhyme with best. But all you need is a couple of adjustments on the stanzas that do not quite rhyme and it would look grand!)
One other thing, just helping you out, only stanzas 2, 5 & 6 are five lines long. May I ask if this was intentional? Because it rather jumbles up the flow of the poem's entirety, mostly making it awkard to follow. Maybe you could shorten them and make them four line length as with the others, in order to make the lines more congruent.
Take note that these are just suggestions, it's your poem and it's lovely. Thank you for entering and good luck on the contest. Cheers.
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