When closing eyes
Long for more
But never find
Their looking for
I ask myself
To such degree
That all my bones
Will crack in me
And dusted shadows
Fall to grace
So lightly stranded
Upon fair face
And when pupils fail
To near adjust
And leave me blind
In all the must
I wander by
With hands outstretched
And feel this face
That time has etched
Though silken words
Are wet by tongue
They leave me barren
Confined to lung
And in this world
A strangers pace
Is all I manage
To replace
But dare I trust
In such a thing
That leaves me here
On broken wing
Or do I hide
Just as before
And will away
The apple core
That bites the lips
In bitter jest
And taunts this day
Per your request
…
For stumbling in
I manage well
But time may end
Too soon to tell
Author notes
Not entirely loving this... I dunno?
Comments and critique much appreciated
A contest entry
- Who Are You? by AngelOfDarkness88.
350 points, ended September 5, 2008, 59 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Bleeding heart by Pothead420.
900 points, ended September 6, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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hey i hate rhyme, more than most people, but that was bearable for me, i actually enjoyed myself, it had that old school feel to it, and had alot of cliche words to it, but they worked well all in all so you're off the hook there, you're really good with form and flow, thats for sure
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Hahaha, ^_^ Well I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. I have to agree with you, I too found it cliche yet bearable, and I'll take your word as far as form and flow goes cause I haven't the slightest clue in the matter
haha
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