Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Adam of Eden's Eve

Husband, spoken softly,
as I would say God,
would never look at me oddly
if I should say:

No, I want nothing else for Christmas
but a rose of velvet red
...
He would nod,
and solemnly declare:
For you, my rose so rare,
I have a rose to spare
...

He would not frown
upon me if I pick the first twig
of jasmine, but would crown
me with the fragrant sprig,
while pressing to my lips a kiss:

Sweet September jasmine wife,
you are my spring flower,
my life ...


He would wake me with a lily
in a vase;
he would call me Silly,
and would hug me in embrace
and show me his forever love,
just in case I should doubt ...

See: it is not difficult to be
the ideal husband for me ...

I have no other want or need,
but being the Eve in my Eden,
freed.








In a list

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • DAMSELx
    September 12, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful...


  • leo2
    September 4, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Exquisite Love

    Any Adam would be proud to have you as his Eve and would be crazy not to make you his one and only wife. The idea expressed is simply beautiful in its' unconditional acceptance of the unity that bond between man and woman. Best wishes in the contest.

    Sincerely,
    Leo Long


    • myrataal silver member
      September 4, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      This is all I ever wanted to be ...

      a one and only wife.

      Now you have me in tears.


  • just mercedes gold member
    August 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh, does he have a brother? Or, being realistic, what is his father doing?

    Your poem is like a waft of spring fresias. And of course the sky is blue.


  • Frodofan silver member
    August 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Why "Eva" and not "Eve?"

    I love the idea hear. It is beautiful and simple and sweet and romantic. Creative too and original. I like the really soft dreamy quality of this piece. It's very lyrical.

    Thanks for entering.


    • myrataal silver member
      August 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      Sorry ... lol

      Eva is Afrikaans ... I changed it to Eve ... Typo, thanks!


  • Sandal
    August 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Romantic and beautiful, I like it very much. The rhymes are subtle but appear at the right time.


    • myrataal silver member
      September 4, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      I love your comments ...

      and the observations thereof.

1 - 10 of 10