Stained blue
windows to your soul
gazing at parts of me
that are to you
alone revealed.
Soft thoughts live
unwrinkled under
velvet ivory brow
your glowing cheeks
the shade of sunrise.
Amused rose lips
tint in knowing smile,
your face framed
in silk of sandy tan.
Enclosed in the silence
of your eyes you
see in me things
too near to touch.
A contest entry
- Anything – and something specific! by Beating.
425 points, ended September 3, 2008, 31 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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"Enclosed in the silence
of your eyes you
see in me things
too near to touch."
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Lovely Poem!
Really nice flow, beautiful sentiment!
Conngrats on your win!
Regards,
DeGraw
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I loved every nuance of this write, the soft feel of spinning the words around in my head. Nice effect. I see a tenderness that shows maturity beyond enduring a mere argument. Does that make sense? Probably not. I think I like best, the idea of watching her face while she's sleeping.
Make sure she knows you're doing it. I had a boyfriend once, loved to do that, I'd wake up, he'd be hovering.
Creepy
.Beautiful write, congratulations on your trophy. very pretty.
Jin
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candence in candlelight
rhythmic pre-possessiveness without the poetic kurd. this is slim functionality with a bit of funk-shway to tabulate the monopolies left undone when all the fake money becomes real. a swirl in tandem is a candid place to be. ~ EZB
www.moodgroove.com
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Oh wow! This piece is beautiful! It's really tender, and I felt pulled in by it's warmth. And, it also felt very fragile, which I liked. The best part though, was the form which was flawless. Good job!
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Polished and bundled so splendidly. I could 'see'
as much as I could feel.
your glowing cheeks
the shade of sunrise. < portrait-worthy)
Beautiful.
A wonderful piece...again!
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This was really good in my opinion because all of the wonderful colorful imagery you used! I ususally am not a fan of freeverse, but to be honest, I did really like this. I could feel emotion in it. You really had me from the first lines all the way to the end! Great job!
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Prolific!
"Stained blue
windows to your soul
gazing at parts of me
that are to you
alone revealed."
Wow. Breathless, speechless, as usual.
Thank you for sharing your talent with all of us, this made my day!
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Sight is with the heart ...
did you know?
And you expressed this so well.
Love
Myra
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How do you always manage to leave me... enthralled, entranced... damn there isn't a word good enough to describe it!!! You just amaze me constantly.
I love every single word in this one - can't even pick out a favorite part. It's so perfect and genuine.
You're great at these mysterious love poems.
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There is a wordless world within in that final stanza. A place where two beings meet, dissolve, transmute and become not just the space of one but something far greater than both.
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The last stanza is so beautiful...and I love the glowing cheeks the shade of sunrise...this paints a lovely picture of color & emotion..
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~ Nicolette
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The last stanza is really wonderful. It holds the emotion and intimacy of the entire piece.
Best wishes to you
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