“Oh Anthony!what evil star
brought Egypt’s Queen this far,
a dual captive of Rome.?
They smote so cruel,so brute,
my empire and my heart,
the conflict so intense
my cup still flows its consequence.
I curse your warrior creed,
honour bound to fall upon your sword,
so lame a deed
because you thought me dead.
The gods are calling from above,
my woman’s reason fails.
Tis I must close my eyes and wail,
and in my sorrow ocean deep,
reach beyond the veil of sleep
where we might meet again.
I will not fail us my love.
But now, tis done,
the asp of death drips blood
still warm on ancient stone,
the fangs draw pangs of fear
for I must go alone,
no robust arms to lean upon.
And at the door
two generals of Rome all seeing
arrive too late
as here within all life is fleeing.
“Was this well done of her”?
I hear a distant cry,
(as if because I was a Queen
I be denied this final thing.)
The surrender of my being.
"Just so." a handmaiden replied,
"As befitting Egypt’s Queen."
© Ronnica
Author notes
This is a prewrite
A contest entry
- #116 Winklings on Wednesdays: Write a poem about women in death by Lyndon.
1500 points, ended September 15, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Well, Ronnica
Cleopatra was a natural for this question. You have not borrowed from Shakespeare. I read your lines with interest. There is a little unevennerss of rhythm but the concept of the form is good. A couple of poeticisms but generally sound diction. Suicide by the bite of the "worm of the Nile", the asp at her breast is vividly accounted for.
Thank you for your enlightening poem.
Lyndon.
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This is an outstanding poem I really love the story of Antony and Cleopatra and this is a beautiful rendition - I wish you the best in the contest!
Keep writing
Polly
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Thank you polly, Old love stories never die.or so it seems
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It was well done of her...
I feel tears when I read this. Poor Cleopatra has died many times since, but your poem has captured the essence of her death and her agony before her suicide.
But, it also captures her love and gives some hope. "I will not fail us, my love."
Your poem is most enjoyable and thought provoking.
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Thank you for the encourageing words RS.
Ronnica
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Wow...Cleopatra in her last moments before death. What a great depiction you have penned in that unique style of yours. You captured my attention with this story and again I got transported back in time with you. Such a great talent you have. best of luck in the contest...alby
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Thank you albymyheart, Your comments are always appreciated.
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Ah! Cleopatra choosing her own fate, one of the most well known stories, re-enacted in film. I think that Egyptians strongly believed in the afterlife, so then, her choice to die. Being a fan of rhyme, I took note of the rhyme in the third. vivid imagery! and well done..
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Thank you for reading, I have a yen for the historical.
Peace
Ronnica
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Superb
I love this, you have captured all the emotion and feeling of a dying woman. Well done and good luck in the contest. Val
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Thank you and wow, I am so pleased you liked it.
Peace
Ronnica
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