Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Indecision

I never said about the hurt
But I'm wondering now...
What if I did?

Would it all just wash away
Like my footprints on the beach
Or would it be like
That homework assignment
With the words I tried to erase
But only succeeded in smudging?

Would they listen
And try a little harder?
I think, if I were lucky,
They might possibly understand.

But then again
What if they didn't hear
Because they were too busy
With a Nintendo DS
With translating Shakespeare
With the computer
With a phone call--
What if they were too busy
And brushed it off
Like they always do?

Hovering on the brink
Wavering between indecision
And firm certainty
I decide to hover a little longer
Waver a little longer
And, when I'm too tired
See which side I fall on.

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Sarah957
    August 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I see you won a gold trophy for this. Those are so addicting! When I get one I am thrilled for like the whole rest of the day. Anyways....
    this is really good. And I can relate. Sometimes making a decision about whether to really share yourself with someone can be agonizing. For me, the only way to go is to just dive in, most of the time I dont regret it when i let go but i do regret it when i hold back.

    "Would it all just wash away
    Like my footprints on the beach
    Or would it be like
    That homework assignment
    With the words I tried to erase
    But only succeeded in smudging?"

    I love the metaphor here. The whole poem is relateable and makes me feel your fear of rejection and need for understanding.

  • piccola silver member
    August 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    yeah that old smudge ... not the dream yet still hanging on. If you rub any more it will tear. Desperate need for understand here ... but too afraid to try for it. Waver too long and any opportunity will be gone


  • righteousme
    August 28, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    first off i think i am speechless but i will try my best

    ... would it be like
    That homework assignment
    With the words I tried to erase
    But only succeeded in smudging?

    ... that is a great picture you make here... the rubbing and the gray streak left behind...

    Hovering on the brink
    Wavering between indecision
    And firm certainty
    I decide to hover a little longer
    Waver a little longer
    And, when I'm too tired
    See which side I fall on....

    the feelings you are putting out there are fierce but lazy ... much like your last line... I LOVE IT!!!
    GREAT WRITE!!!