Breathe in, blow out.
This is how it starts.
Pressured into trying,
To make them happy.
Breathe in, blow out.
Here's how it continues.
Always gasping for breaths,
Between our outings.
Breathe in, blow out.
This is how it ends.
Burned holes into my heart,
As you slowly commit suicide.
Breathe in, blow out.
That's what hurt me.
So please let me help,
And just put it out.
Author notes
I hope you and your girlfriend like this poem. Also I hope that it can be used as a great inspiration to stop hurting herself.
I tried to use the colors of a lit cigarette:
white the main color, brown the part you put your lips on, black for the soot, and red for like the heat of it burning down.
A contest entry
- For My Girlfriend. by SmileFromGlasgow.
1927 points, ended October 9, 2008, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What's your opinion?
Comments
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all my parents smoke... and I want them to stop, but they won't... they keep going back. I just learned to deal finally, even if it hurts me, more then them. (I have astmas... it kills to breath it in) I loved the words chosen, and those two should quit, but remember, it's not EASY to quit... I've seen it. Very nicely done, and luck.
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Good imagery!
Hello, I'm the girlfriend
. Like this one a lot. Simple but with a parking lot of meaning behind it. I dig that. Thank you very much
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