"Some twenty four long years ago
I finally reached my prime;
Walked both ways uphill through snow
half naked half the time."
I just wanted someone who was there,
somebody on my side;
someone with half a heart to share
to warm the cold inside.
"You don't know how life is now,
so easy all the time!
When I was young we had to plow
raw sewage mixed with slime."
You're the one who's supposed to know;
who'll show me how to live,
you're supposed to watch me grow
and teach me to forgive?
Friends tell me they think they see,
I'm half happy half the time.
'Friends' they really don't know me;
I feel half dead and that's a crime.
Author notes
Everybody started out in diapers...some grew up, some grew old, some did both way too soon.
A contest entry
- - Dark Footprints in the Light - by Desire.
875 points, ended August 30, 2008, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
Thank You!!
Thank You for Your entry: Mutation
This piece tugged hard at Spirit and while I was reading which I do several times~ Images come to me in many forms~ while taking in Your words: half naked half the time- after reading this line- I am shown a child wearing summer clothes in the winter- day after day- another child wearing just a diaper when it is 10 below outside- for some reason being shown a woman holding a glass with liquor- it appears like rum- after reading again- I'm seeing reference to the parent-guardian expectations way to high- like the child expected to be a man- expected to do adult tasks when the child has not even reach elementary school yet- basically forced to fend for self-forced to be perfect in an imperfect world- However this to be interpreted
Whether metaphor or symbolism
Hopefully the above comment makes some sense~
Excellent take on the prompt ~
Powerful images & message You have brought forth
Thank You for sharing Your Voice and Spirit!
Best wishes to You in the contest Sweet Soul
**Judging will be done shortly...
Many blessings too
and much love & light~ Desire~*~
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