I can’t do anything right…
Daddy tells me I’m naughty every night…
All I wanted was a little snack
Now he’s yelling at me, whipping my back…
I can’t do anything right…
He tells me to get out of his sight…
All I needed was a little love,
Instead he gave me a sturdy shove…
I can’t do ANYTHING right..
It’s my fault mommy and daddy fight..
All I said was I was cold,
I’m just an inconvenience, I am told.
I just can’t do anything right…
So now I am gone, into the light.
Author notes
15 Poets
15 Lines (more or less)
In a list
A contest entry
- - Dark Footprints in the Light - by Desire.
875 points, ended August 30, 2008, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Constructive Criticism Welcome - Be Honest - Thanks :)
Comments
-
Thank You!!
Thank You for Your entry: Innocence Ignored
This piece tugged hard at Spirit and while I was reading which I do several times~ Images come to me in many forms~ while taking in Your words: whipping my back- I'm being shown images of children in other countries who are forced into labor- beaten senseless- expected to do an adults work but paid in pain-suffering After reading, I'm being shown a ruler hitting hands on the table-desk type of foundation~ It is sad when a parent- guardian releases his or her stress onto the Innocent- nobody is perfect so when a child spills- drops something- the parent-guardian flies off the handle Tears cannot help but fall
Hopefully this makes some sense~
Excellent take on the prompt ~
**Please credit Photobucket in the AC- Thankies so much
Powerful images & message You have brought forth
Thank You for sharing Your Voice and Spirit!
Best wishes to You in the contest Sweet Soul
**Judging will be done shortly...
Many blessings too
and much love & light~ Desire~*~
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Wow So True
This poem is excellent with it's imagery and the realities of the little girls feelings of being abused. It is horrible child abuse and the poor kid like you said feels as though it's their fault. It is such a crying shame. Your rhyme and flow were excellent. Best of luck in the contest.
Many Blessings
Kelle Marie
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htis is so sd. tears started to form. my god how can any one do this to a child. i know a lot have felt or still feeling like this. and its horrible.
but with poets like you, that write pieces like this others should know that they are not alone.
the words go so well with the image.
thanks for sharing and good luck in the contest.
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