I had my future planned once.
I saw it in my stars.
I knew it would come true once
Beneath ill-fated Mars.
I feared it but embraced it.
No sense to fight my fate,
Yet knew that I would hate it.
I feared I was too late.
Still when I neared the cross-roads,
I fought my destiny.
I overcame my fortune.
The heavens set me free.
I knew what lay ahead once,
But chose another route.
Not knowing where it lead to
Besides that it lead out.
I knew how life would be once
And wished it wouldn't be.
Therefore I dared to gamble
And choose my destiny!
Perhaps it is no better.
At least it isn't worse.
But doing so I undid
The fortune teller's curse!
A contest entry
- The Fantasy Element by ArchOblivion.
600 points, ended September 7, 2008, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 31 of 31
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Deep
So many of us try to change our destiny or future. Some of us regret doing that. Others don't and enjoy their lives. We all unique people and chose the roads we should take in life. This is a very good write.
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Bandits United!
Great rhythm and rhyme to this poem. You chose an interesting topic of sealed fate vs mastery over one's destiny. I think a lot of us fall in the middle, make some choices, but then let some pieces fall where they may.
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Bandits United
I liked this story. I thought it was a lively tale and full of adventurs. It is a gamble going after your destiny. -
Bandits United!
I think that the rhyme is almost flawless in this piece, and what a great concept, to know that we really are in control of our own destiny, and nothing is written in stone, except perhaps the "Ten Commandments" lol...I loved this!
Love & Light
Debbera
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Ha ha. True.
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Bandits United!
Wonderful imagrey and flow to these lines. Very well written and an absolute pleasre to read. Thank you for sharing, Enjoy your day in the spotlight!
Elle.
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BANDITS UNITED!!!!!!!
I enjoyed the rthym and the message of controling ones own destiny a lot. Well done my fellow bandit, well done!
Stars Guide You.
DW -
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Thanks. I like the text in your face image too. Couldn't agree more (been there, done that).
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Bandits United!
This is wonderful!! Amazing imagery and flow! I was just blown away. Then again, I usually am with rhyming because I suck at it. lol But thank you for this, it's beautiful!
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Aw, thanks. Years of practice.
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Bandits United!
What an amazing ride you have taken me on. Amazing imagery. I love the stars an often wonder who or what may up there. But I am scared of heights so I don't think I could ever get on a spaceship lol. Thanks for sharing this amazing write I love the background too. Enjoy your day in the spotlight hugs your Bandit sister Theresa -
BANDITS UNITED !
I like this poem of self examination, external expectations and finally self determination. Often we try to fit people in molds they do not belong in just to suit our own sense of order. Cookie cutter lives are often boring and unfulfilling. The rule we need to live by is 'To thine own self be true'. Thank you for sharing this thoughtful and thought provoking poem.
You have been Spotlighted by your Poetic Bandit family today because WE CARE!
Brother Dennis
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Bandits United
Fantastic trip to the stars, daring to play wirh with the hand of fate, changing destiny, and daring to win. It flows really well.
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Bandits United!
Such a great write. I liked the rhyming, it was subtle but I helped give the poem such a great flow. I liked how freeing the poem was but I do question whether or not you truly knew your fate in the first place but I'm sure you know what I mean. Cheers
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Bandits United!
Fab background, and a great meter throughout this lovely rhyming tale. You have really set an atmosphere for your reader to enjoy using this clever combination. Well done.
Enjoy your day to shine in our Bandit spotlight today!
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Bandits United!!!
well i am not into fortune tellers but this is a cute story. great rhythm and rhyme. thank you for sharing your talent with us. keep writing! God bless you always
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Thanks
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Bandits United. This is your day in the spotlight. Enjoy.
Liked the presentation, the colors and side bar you used for this poem. Good rhythm, rhyme and flow in these lines. (noticed a double space behind besides and before that) Interesting avatar to go with this....
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Thank you. I made the background with some of my own phososhop brushes. And I fixed the double space.
Thank you.
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Bandits United!
This is a very strong poem and I love the way that it really shows the power of choice very well worded ... this has a natural rhythm that makes it a delight to read well done!
Keep writing
Polly
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BANDITS UNITED
I knew how life would be once
And wished it wouldn't be.
Therefore I dared to gamble
And choose my destiny!
The best pathway in life, and this is an excellent poem that weaves in the fantasy element so well!
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Bandit United!
Great write and flow. a pleasue to read because t flowed so easy.
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BANDITS UNITED!
A far-out poem that catches my fancy plenty well! You have some fine fantasy images here, well expressed poetically. 
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BANDITS UNITED
I really like this my favorites lines are in the second verse it is an amazing poem thank you for sharing your talent be well
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Bandits United
Your offering speaks a great message of encouragement. As well there is one of personal responsibility, for destiny is ours to shape, to form from our innermost being.
Your flow and thoughts blend well along the poetic path throughout. I enjoyed this very much.
Respectfully,
Silent Hawk
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What a great message this poem has,, my friend -- we can change our destiny, if so we choose As always, you've captured it in breathtaking rhyme, and breath-keeping meter
Best wishes,
Zach
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A very good tale of rhyme and wonder and challenging our own fate. A very good read, thank you for your entry and good luck.
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Ah good for you miss, you've written both a nice poem and a bit of encouragement. The form and and execution of the rhyme are worth the read alone...the addition of a good tale makes it even better., Dannie
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Ah, so you have taken the road less travelled! a brilliant narrative poem. Excellent as are all of your pieces.... bravo...
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I love poems that tell a story, n that woz no exception!! it woz the best poem iv red so far this summer!!!!!
Savvy
oxox
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Love the BG!
Not into fortune tellers (1 Samuel 28:3-25)+
but a good write that we have the control to choose our own fate, our own paths in life and not be stagnated by some celestial coincidence. Good job, and best of luck in the contest!
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