Uncertainty

Uncertainty, behind doors, daring the corridors to flicker:Inside, out.Nothing to touch, untouched by everything.Now then and when a similie for why.Running, into the seven corners of the green seas of damnation; haggling for the lowest price at the edge of the knife.If I could free myself from my eyes, could I be the founder of liberty? Who asks for liberty anymore? "No one" says the seller of peanuts.That does not mean it is won! The worker is free (as much as he could be), the shipyards are modern, the manual laborer is not too far less of...Yet all this liberty imprisons desires.I can have what I want, who I want.But if I find other then what I want then I am a nigger.I could have her, I could be him: but I do not want her, I wouldn't dare be like him, I want what I want: Damned! How freely the water from the fountain flows.Green, celeste in mornings, dark at night; beautiful, free...excpected.

Am I seeing these words as a rebellion? How can I rebel? Can I make myself believe something just by feeling it? Come, come, come, shout my feelings out loud, quietly, everlasting screams of seconds.Keep on saying it until the deafening inevitability fades away.I sit here, sipping at a pint of darkness.The walls slumber, a vague light looks at what my hand writes and I look at what it sees maybe through its godless eyes I can see something else.Remembering memories, as soon as they come before my eyes they become ideas.No: Questions.I could touch a smile I wore this morning of afternoons, was it me smiling or the barbarian hacking down futelessly the doors of what I ignore.Ignore, who am I to ignore what owns me? I think, the hapiness I knew - it was not mine - was demeaning.I submited to delirium, I snuck behind the watchful eyes of my past, and the present that holds me.I am ashamed, everything that sees me loves me and..know me..Yes I can feel what you want for me - I want it as well.Isn't it wonderful!