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War of the Whorls

Missing image

                                    image by  Hollow by Exhale_NL - Deviantart


 

 

I believed the tremor from the previous day

Were disturbances, unlike felt before,

As the routine of humanity shunted itself.

Human affairs were nonetheless kept going.

 

 

From the height of office blocks,

Cracks appeared in the roads

As an alluring, gaping expanse

Succeeded to drill out cavities,

Transparent, though cylindrical in form,

 

 

Segmented, spiraling whorls

Protruded to investigate.

Disturbing a sight where underground..,

The unseen dread was superimposed

As transparency converged as an elevator.

Though without reason our responsibilities,

For who had transported these things.

And without influence, into the night.

Prove that  the cavities exist unto this day.  

Author notes

and using the quote, "
i am already done
i am already gone
because i am...
hollow... "

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10
  • meena krish
    August 26, 2008

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    You always seem to come up with a mind boggling write that makes a reader want to read more. Congrats on the
    trophy..take care.


  • faithwhisperer silver member
    August 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Congrats! I really like this one, Tony! Your subject is great with your word choices and theme too!


  • FransB gold member
    August 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Congratulations

    to a fine poem, written in style. Frans


  • JinSays gold member
    August 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Fantastic work of art. These words ring clear, true. The BG is gorgeous, lends such a melancholy feel to it.
    The hollow part did it, huh?
    Yes great prompt choice, fantastic entry. Is there anything you cannot write about?
    Congratulations on the bronze my Sweet!

    you did a splendid job here,
    Jin


  • z etoile
    August 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I liked I really like your style great job.


  • Salt Therapy
    August 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    tony this is beautiful... I hope you win.


  • Wind 03
    August 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    :)))))

    this is an amazing piece where it made me feel as if i was in the mids of it...very deep!the quate were disturbance unlike felt before gave me chills well done! keep up the great work tony!


    juliet


  • Jalalbad gold member
    August 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    YOU painted a picture in words of a reacurring dream thst I use to have... I was above the world watching destruction on earth. Thanks for the reminder Titus, I will be more aware for having read this poem. I wish you the best in the contest


  • ArtFullyMe silver member
    August 23, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    This reminds me in a rather surreal way of war of the worlds.. and yet of course is not that, but more like war of the worlds as it is..

    in the sense that it seems to speak of cavities in society, the universe, and well even if it doesn't.. I like taking it that way

    great roll with the prompt


  • Cannonsfire
    August 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Really like where you took this prompt and picture, the hollow universe is what I saw in this picture too. So very well done here. Love, C

1 - 10 of 10