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The Mistwraith's Curse

For five centuries long the skies always were grey,
no stars seen at night and no sun during day.
The world of Athera, by Mistwraith was bound,
‘till a prophesy answer could be found.

Two enemy princes, to exile were flung,
half brothers by blood, yet to hatred they clung.
They had to unite so the world could be freed;
they pushed back their hatred so they could succeed.

The Master of Shadows was the prince Arithon.
His brother Lysaer had the gift of the dawn.
The Lord of the Light was what he was named;
by joining their gifts, the mist could be tamed.

The Fellowship of Seven gave aid to the brawl,
with sorcerous help, the Mistwraith did fall.
But during the battle, the sorcerers did find,
that one of the wraiths entered Lysaer’s neat mind.

‘Twas dormant for days, so they entered the town
where Arithon was to acquire the crown.
He was their high king, by royal blood right,
they wanted no king so they put up a fight.

Sunny and clear was Coronation Day,
but the wraith sent Lysaer’s friendship away.
Consumed by the wraith-sent hate that he felt,
his brother he turned on and a blow he dealt.

His light battled dark in the midst of the square,
and a geas from the wraith hit Arithon there.
Now he did hate, though less than his kin,
yet still he loathed to take life to win.

He changed the day into blackest of nights,
and commanded his shadows to cover his flight.
Bone weary from magic, he went as fast as he could,
away from the city to hide in the wood.


The clan in that area saw that he was the heir,
and after hearing his story began to prepare.
For through all the centuries, loyal were they,
all the townsmen they hated and wanted to slay.

When Arithon told how his brother did hate,
the clansmen agreed they would retaliate.
They promised their prince that they would help fight,
they’d help him defend against the city’s might.

Lysaer’s army was great, and Arithon’s small,
yet clansmen did promise that they’d give their all.
They planned to outwit the army with tricks,
so to try to avoid many armed conflicts.

The city was ready, the army set out,
they sent men ahead in order to scout.
One returned with good news, “There are children ahead!
Let’s follow them and see where we’re led.”

Lysaer agreed and he and some troops
chased after the children to be led to their group.
But clansmen were ready, as they closed the gap,
they made sure children were safe and then sprung the trap.

From all sides of the valley the water poured down,
many died from the force, and others did drown.
When waters were calm, very few were alive,
and clansmen were shooting the few who survived.

Yet Lysaer escaped, the battle began,
the army discovered the girls of the clan.
Showing no mercy, they vented their hate,
and Arithon found that he got there too late.

The clan leader’s son they needed to guard,
and Arithon’s men fought very hard.
Yet the cost of their vict’ry was bitterly high,
as many a man did fall there to die.

The battle twixt brothers inevit’ bly came,
and sorcery tore through the skies like flame.
In order to protect the clan leader’s child,
the prince of the clans let his shadows run wild.

Defeated at last, Lysaer’s army did flee,
but the clan did not celebrate their victory.
All women were dead, most children were killed,
The clansmen agreed too much blood had been spilled.

When Arithon woke he asked, “How many died?
And hearing the answer he sorrow’fly cried,
“Oh Lysaer, my brother why did this occur?
Why can’t we be friends, like we once were?”

The clan leader’s son stood wracked with grief,
his father was dead and he now was chief.
The prince of the clans rose and went to his side,
he said to the boy, “Your father should not have died.”

“I feel I must go, for if it wasn’t for me,
all the clansmen who died, here would still be.
I can’t risk the lives of the rest of the clan,
I’ll go off on my own and risk no other man.”

The Master of Shadows, the prince Arithon,
took leave from the clans and soon he was gone.
His brother Lysaer, the Lord of the Light,
still swore he would kill, and make all things ‘right.’

Author notes

This was actually origionally for a school project way back in 10th grade. It is essentially the plot of Janny Wurts' book, "The Curse of the Mistwraith" set into poetic form by me. So all characters, settings, etc. are hers.
Written April 16th, 2001

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Comments


  • Vagabond
    March 20, 2007

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    hmm, well, i had two major nitpick of this poem... though it was long... longish... sort of... longer than alot of others in my contest anyways. lol. These were: i would have prefered an origional story as opposed to one taken from someone elses work (I understand that my contest rules said ANYTHING and so i have no right to complain, and that you sought only to do honor to a book you enjoyed, but still the brainchildren of the poet are always so much more beautiful and lovingly written than the leftovers of some other writer)
    Secondly, while the story was, for the most part well told, i found that the use of some words and phrases really ruined the overall "ancient" and "deep" feelings of the poem and made the story seem over simplified and a bit modern. Still, it was a good attempt overall, and clearly there was alot of work put into it. Plus it was for school, so really who can blame you if it lacks a little enthusiasm-wise... good work anyways, and good luck. and prolly congrats because you've managed to drag the longest reveiw out of me that i've probably ever written (excluding those that i wrote to spite people who critisized me for short ones!)


  • Summer Breeze
    October 21, 2006
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    V.Good

    Shadowsong’s - The Mistwraith's Curse

    First off I would like to thank you and everybody who entered my competition since it can take a lot of effort to write certain poems and some this time around have been impressive. All the entries have been carefully looked at by myself and ‘the dude’, so you can rest assured my normal double marking regime is still in place from my previous competitions, nice and fair averaged straight down the middle.

    This had a very intense storyline, that’s what I believe in any case, that it’s a story within a poem or perhaps it was written as a sonnet? I liked the flow and there was definitely a real life to the words/idea’s you conveyed. After I got home with all my printed poems off all the entries and got to yours; my thoughts were ‘oh not another long one’, but I actually enjoyed reading and soaking up the details of the story.

    However that said the language use could have been better and yours took me longer to critique than the others; added to that the ending was a bit predictable, in my opinion. But then again I read so much fantasy - Sci-Fi I can guess most endings.

    Perhaps more importantly it made me think of Pans Labyrinth by Del Toro.

    Good luck and remember my view is not the force of divinity in this competition, so if I really praise you that’s no guarantee.

  • NeferMaatNetjer silver member
    January 24, 2004
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    J.R.R Tolkein would have been proud of such a poem! I love fantasy, and this is great.


  • naena
    January 21, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    This was an epic! The wonderful wording complimented the setting of the story nicely. Though a heartbreaking tale it was, I enjoyed watching it play out. I never read the book...but I might read it now. I'm sorry I missed this somehow...good thing I did a double check! Thanks for sharing! Naena