Spiritually bankrupt
incomprehensibly demoralized
none left to turn to
Sun sets on another drunken binge
Author notes
Love you Tory.
[Lyrics Line Prompt]
Your Prompt is: Lyrics Line Below
"And the sun will set for you-"
from Linkin Park- Shadow of the Day
If you or anyone you know think they have a problem with Alcohol/Drugs.
Contact your local AA/NA office and find a meeting near you.
Go and find out for yourself, don't leave 5 minutes before the miracle happens.
A contest entry
- - Speak to Me in 15 Words XXXVI - by Desire.
700 points, ended August 27, 2008, 15 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Was it worth posting?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Thank You!!
Thank You for Your entry: Remorse
This piece tugged hard at Spirit and while I was reading which I do several times~ Images come to me in many forms~ while taking in Your words: Spiritually bankrupt- Powerful first few words and last line leaves an aftertaste which the reader remembers- For some reason I am seeing words: Jose Cuervo- and this may sound strange but feels like a vision or dream- seeing a person sitting on a beach chair- atop golden sand watching the waves roll in- umbrella overhead- blocking rays of sun however seeing this *image* get washed out- like when there is watercolors painted and liquid is thrown on the canvas- the paint just blends-bleeds- Also while reading was seeing a cross hanging from a cord- bronze- and again being shown first few words: Spiritually bankrupt- being shown reference: time for a deposit- what are You willing to give of Yourself- ....and the sun will set for You however that is to be interpreted- Whether metaphor or symbolism
Hopefully this makes some sense~
Excellent take on the prompt ~
Powerful images & message You have brought forth
Thank You for sharing Your Talent also Voice!
Best wishes to You in the contest Sweet Soul
**Judging will be done shortly...
Many blessings too
and much love & light~ Desire~*~
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Well versed poem, my friend. Fifteen words aren't many to speak with, and you used each word precisely.
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Awesome job my friend ~ Including the background. I like how you took the prompt, not necessarily reflecting the actual music video, but to a different level. I love the message you put in your Authors notes, it shows what a caring and compassionate man you are!
Bravo on the limiting of words... I know that was a challenge, and your words are exceptional.
Good luck in the contest! -
Wow, that's really depressing. Good write, tho.
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Good words penned here...Excellent take!
Good luck!
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