random packages with
your address and
your name and
a posted-on-crooked-
stamp:
this is how
I remember you.
I don’t cry even
though I’m alone
in a weird place.
all I can think
is ohgoshohgosh
and this can't
happen again-
and shit like that.
there is no noise
and they are
probably covering
you now and
I’m not at
your funeral.
I can’t even sneak
in late and slide
into the back
row where no one
knows I’m missing.
I want to snicker
at the awkward
speeches and old
ladies with macho
dresses.
I want to tell
you that if you
can hear me with
your dead ears and
your not working
cochlea that I kind of
did love you.
and that you
are in a better
place than deep-
south georgia.
but it is not
meant to be.
and there is no
such thing
as fate
and heaven.
Author notes
Besides the fact that I'm far from home, I just learned today that a close family member of mine died and her funeral was tonight. Then of course, after I wrote this poem the first time my computer crashed and I had to rewrite it. :/ It's been a sucky day.
A contest entry
- silencio at feast by Virgoan.
2500 points, ended September 13, 2008, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Any advice is welcome
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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a perfect contemporary poem - i love everything in this, everyone can easily understand the simple sound yet deep implications that this piece holds.
Excellent.
Thanks for sharing your gift.
HENSLEY
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i think this is perfect
.
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the more real the piece , the more it tends to lend itself to others . i loved it and its rawness out here in a land of coverups ... great piece !!!
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In general, I am sorry. On a poetic note, I thought this poem was quite good and I think poetry like this doesn't need someone to pick at it...But just to know this moment and give their eyes, which could very well be the only present someone could receive in a moment of grief. Eyes to see the bit of life we fail to understand, until it is gone...
Sorry for your loss. Truly I am.
;
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thanks. my personal stuff always sounds kind of cheesy to me, so I'm glad it sounds okay to other people. It's just one of those weeks- it'll get better I hope.
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I don't think it sounds bad at all...Perhaps you are too hard on your own work. I was just sorry for your loss and I'm sure you will get better, in time.
;
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