Pain is beautiful.
Eyes water in brightness, dazzled
by the awesomeness
of enormous, empty purity –
metaphoric branches
laden with cobwebs of spun snow,
ice nodules catch the sunlight
and split it into rainbows.
Above, the sky a burnished, metallic blue;
the wind, has lost its breath.
There is no sound of any kind –
only suffocating, crushing emptiness.
I think of moonless nights –
relief from this blistering visibility.
I am tiny, unimportant, far beneath notice
contemplating my own significance -
for if I am negligible,
who then can persecute me?
Nihility
©crisstiena
Author notes
Prompt: Running on Empty
image: snow serenity by ~Krapivka2007@deviantART
In a list
A contest entry
- Running On Empty by Touchof1der.
600 points, ended August 27, 2008, 15 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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There is such a sadness surrounding your words here. You have taken the prompt to an interesting place. Best of luck to you in the contest. I appreciate your taking the time and making the effort to enter. I hope it proved to be an enjoyable experience and challenge for you.
♥ Touchof1der -
YOu've used some terrific words in this piece, and not forced either. The metaphors in this are astronomical, and the awareness scintilating. Well done.!
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Not that I want to feed into your nihility, as it were, but truth be told the planet is an uncaring piece of dirt. Your living or dying will not cause it to falter in either its spin or its orbit. If every human being on this planet were to disappear tomorrow, nature would continue happily along without us. In 100 years (the blink of an eye in time), our greatest cities would be like Mayan ruins--overgrown with trees and vines. The sun would continue to shine, the moon to rise and set, the tides to ebb and flow. Nice poem, by the way. I like the ending most of all.
~woof
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That is what I am counting on...
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i have so missed your poetic nurture...and as if ive not missed a single word...and you move me in my own desperity...as if to watch a flower bloom...slowly in anticipation....waiting...waiting....waiting
this poem drips of emptiness
mal
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You are (always) magnificent, my Friend...
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Such an emptiness here. The last lines remind me of an Afrikaans song - roughly translated it goes something like "if nobody knows of you, nobody can forget you...". There can be serenity in emptiness but man/woman wasn't made to be alone... it's like two sides of a coin. Very moving piece this is. Great to see a new poem from your pen.
~ Nicolette
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Indeed who
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