Pictures, captions,
Memory galore,
The people you love and those you abhor.
Remember the prom,
And that football game,
Remember that project
That was oh so lame.
Mugshots, action shots,
Stories too,
Every last one means something to you.
The work that goes in is worth the time spent,
When to each person the special book's lent.
A record book,
A history,
A picture book,
A reference book,
And it's still so much more.
A yearbook, it's timeless,
To last forever more.
Author notes
FINALIST! WHOO!
And yeah, I wrote about a yearbook.
I've been on yearbook staff a week and three days and it's already the hardest class I've ever taken.
If people only realized what kind of work went into it, then they might appreciate it more.
I mean, when they have it ten years down the road, it helps them remember the past.
And how many people have seen they're parents and grandparents yearbooks.
They truly are timeless.
A contest entry
- Final Option - Finalist - Open to all by Florida Sunshine.
1150 points, ended September 7, 2008, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think!!!
Comments
-
My official review of your poem in the contest. Because this is a 'final' contest, I am feel I should be as strict as I can be in looking over every aspect of the poetry presented. I have never claimed to be an expert in any of the categories, however I have been learning a great deal over the last few months. Not only did I want to challenge you [the poet] but myself as a judge.
Below I've made the ruling/score in regards to the points. If you disagree with any of my reasoning please 'reply' to the comment made – with “Challenge” and explain where you feel my assessment is wrong, if I agree with your argument I will change the score. I'm never to proud to admit when I'm wrong. If I feel I am still correct I will bring in a 2nd judge to make the final decision to a change. This final judge will be through my grammar group.
Your Scores:
Finalist -- 10/10 points - Congratulations on making the final round, I'm glad you were inspired to enter.
Use of Prompt - 25/25 Points – Timeless – I do see how time is captured and held in a photograph or a yearbook.
Poetic Form – 20/20 points – This is regards to the actual structure of the poem. It appeared as a free write style. What I've learned from writing free verse is you use words to 'pack' the punch. To a certain extent I feel you've accomplished this.
Use of Grammar - 8/10 Points – The usage of some of your words seems out of place. For example: The sentence is, “The work that goes in is worth the time spent, [When] to each person the special book's lent.” I doesn't appear the word 'when' fits with the sentence. It seems like it should had been two separate sentences instead of one. My assumption is you are now speaking in regards to the 'yearbook' and the work throughout the year that you and others have put into it. -The work that goes in, is worth the time spent, to each person this special book is lent.” I think the problem with the line, is trying to stay with the rhyme. Making it two sentences as two separate thoughts. -2
Spelling - 10/10 points - Perfect
Overall Presentation 20/25 points – I loved poem overall, I would had enjoyed this rhyme forever memorialized in my own yearbook.
Your total score is 93
I do appreciate your participation. It was a welcome pleasure to read and review your work. I think you did a terrific job!
Best of luck to you,
Florida Sunshine
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