sugar-spooned falsity
fortifies nothing
she never questions
any of her answers
or her own lack of intelligence
fingertips apparent against
the windowsill
she leaves them
wherever she goes
like her own hall of fame
a smudged presence
breaks innocence as
silvered particles
defy gravity
defy rules her father made
it's her latest art project
Author notes
"Do You Know what sin is?
it's not eating the fruit of wisdom.
Do you know what sin is?
It's not listening to snake's honey-laced words.
Do You still not know what sin is?
That would be your sin."
-Fredica Bernkastal"
A contest entry
- ~Do Still Not Know What Sin Is~ by SoulfulBubbles.
300 points, ended October 2, 2008, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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This is a very well penned take on the prompt. Unique in every way in comparison, with such a refreshing presence.
"sugar-spooned falsity
fortifies nothing"
.. a great opening to allow room for thought, and intensity a place to writhe beautifully ..
Great imagery and depth to be absorbed. Nicely done!
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Didn't really like this poem, but thank you
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oo this is neat very interesting tone and voice
"she never questions
any of her answers"
it seems like her defiance towards her father is her art project, i like that
congrats your a finalist
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Thank you. Her art project is rebellion, which definitely would include her defiance to her father.
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I agree with Mairi bheag, I seem to always agree with her
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-'tis fine writing raye.
-joan.
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Thanks Joan
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A very distinctive "voice" for such a young poet. You have a talent one can only hope to see develop. Welcome to AP, where you will be an asset.
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...*grins* You have only been a member for two hours? *celebrates* I am so glad I discovered you (well, you me, but who's counting). This is contemporary and original free verse. Your ending was quite good. Nicely done.
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Call it a binary discovery
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