Memories that I don't want to forget;
Cloudless and pure.
Where have you been all my life?
Let the sky fall.
Look up.
Maybe that's where you are.
Author notes
Not sure if this is what you're looking for.
Maybe it isn't.
But I was prompted by the word "sky"
I wasn't sure if you wanted to describe it... Oh well.
But I hope you like it.
28 words. =]
A contest entry
- QUICKIE - 15 entries! prompt inspired by etoile.
458 points, ended August 22, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Memories that I don't want to forget;
Cloudless and pure
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the imagery there was wonderful
but i thought the flow seemed kindof disrupted at times, especially in the last 3 lines when you used the periods. they could've been for impact; but to me they didnt really do much, maybe commas would be better? just a thought..
thanks a lot for entering and goodluck
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Memories that I don't want to forget.
Cloudless and pure.
I don't think you need a period after the first line... maybe a semicolon?
that's just me though
good luck. -
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Okay. I'll change that. Thanks for the suggestion.

-Tsuki
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