I long for the ripest of fruit
sitting high atop the tree
impossibly high from arms reach
I crave there tender flesh and refreshing juices
rotten fruit blanket the aging grass
begging for me to take them home
they taste of lust and mistakes
after a few bites we both feel disappointed
swiftly, we go our separate ways
a bitter taste lingering in the back of my throat
is the only proof they were here at all
stomach growls and im cleaning the forest floor of its trash again
Seeds take root deep in my heart
after years of watering from weeping eyes
a shadow of hopelessness overcomes me
so dark that any saplings of happiness
are killed before bearing fruit
when all hope is lost in anger
were to busy loathing the rotten apples
to take a chance and climb the tree
Author notes
I wrote something...who would have thought
whatev
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Oh. This is a nice little poem that you have penned in here. Well, the message isn't so nice, it's more sad and about regret and stuff. That's always hard because they say that hindsight is 20/20 and that's so true. It's definitely better to take the risk and not regret then to have a bitter taste in your mouth, right? I thought you did a good job of expressing yourself here.
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when all hope is lost in anger
were to busy loathing the rotten apples
to take a chance and climb the tree
I feel as though this stanza is too barefaced and doesn't have as much impact as the rest of the poem. I like the imagery, but in this stanza it seems to dwindle some.
Overall though, nice job. It flows well and I enjoyed reading it
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Well described poetry to bring the immages of this life and its compexities as well..wonderfully weaved immageries and metaphors..well done...
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I really enjoyed this poem. I like the metaphor of just taking the apples that are the easiest instead of taking a risk to get the ones that you really wanted - the love that you knew would be the best for you. It is such a rich poem filled with fantastic imagery I read it a few times and enjoyed it more each time. There are a few spelling issues though that you may need to address 'were to busy' - we were too busy? 'I crave there' - I crave their? Other than that, great! I look forward to reading more of your work.
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-imagines an apple being diasappointed at being bitten into and walking away-
(see stanza 2)
Well.. it's under the love category, so that says what it's about i guess.
I could make some comment about ladders but, probably best not to.
I liked the phrasing of blanket as a verb in "rotten fruit blanket the aging grass".
x
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