He Said …
I’m not the man I used to be,
my mirror will agree,
Time is not the least concerned
who’s staring back at me!
She Said …
This glass reflects your inner eye
That struggles to be free,
From all the time you could not fly
Because of the debris …
He Said …
That golden glow of youth has turned
several shades of gray
Though greener pastures beckon still
I know where I must stay
She Said …
The golden glow of starlight still
Shines bright, for me to see
Your soul has wings, your hands the skill
To share that inner sea!
He Said …
Those ruby lips and bright blue eyes
entice the soul to wait,
For your immortal blessings
this side of Heaven’s gate.
She Said …
Kind blessings shared are yours my friend
I thank the Lord of all …
Who made the sun and moon to shine
Before His final call.
He Said …
And so I’m told the road winds on,
an ever steeper climb
To reach those clouds of silvered hope
and leave my woes behind
She said
I’ll take your hand along the path
As life expands our views,
There’s miles of scenes and new found things
On which we both can muse …
Author notes
This is my first collaboration with Joy,
aka, http://allpoetry.com/waydownuponjoy
She is a very talented writer and a pure joy with whom to work.
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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wow
This is wonderful, I just loved the rhyem to this poem. I just love the flow of words, and the detail work of he said she said.. This was a pleasure to read.
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Delightful
Terrific Collaboration.
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THIS IS WHAT A COLLABORATION IS SUPPOSED TO BE! LOVELY!
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This is a really clever and creative write, it had the sort of old classic read aloud under the moon feel about it, which I love, and then a hint of the more modern to engage the reader, and give the whole thing dimension
thanks for a very fine read
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The rhyme in this is superb, only the third to last stanza was a bit off, and the dialog is touching and I found some of it a bit humorous, I don't know if that was intended.
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You make a good team Leo. I see you are not
writing as much lately either. Sorry I haven't
been around, my life has been wild this summer.
Good write my friend.
Red
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wow
For a collaboration this flows beautifully, you seemed to have been on the same perfect wavelength with this one! Nice idea of using he said, she said, sort of makes it more interesting to read! i wouldnt have thought this was a collaboration as usually they tend to end up a little disjointed! well done fantastic work from both of you xx cheryl
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This is a superb collaboration, Leo and Joy. Funny thing, as I was reading this, before I read your author note about it being a collaboration, I thought how much fun it would be to do a collaboration with you with something
It's so well presented, each line fitting together easily, naturally.
I haven't read Joy's poetry yet but will certainly do so
And as Renee said, you've given a whole new look with the positive side of 'He said, She said'
Great job
Dee
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This was such an amazing poem and so beautifully written. Two great minds with two great hearts. Brilliant work.
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Superb!
The two of you have made me see the saying; "he said, she said..." as a positive instead of my past thinking of that phrase as a negative.
THANK YOU BOTH!
The opening lines give an image of some one who accpets their growth, age, and maturing. I relate to this work of genius from both the male, and the female advantage.
"He Said …
And so I’m told the road winds on,
an ever steeper climb
To reach those clouds of silvered hope
and leave my woes behind
She said
I’ll take your hand along the path
As life expands our views,
There’s miles of scenes and new found things
On which we both can muse …"
You two did a splendid job! Congratulations on a job well done.
Much Love ♥
Renee
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Leo and Joy
This is pure JOY, and I have enjoyed each word of it. I am glad that I did not realise that this was a collaboration, and can therefore appreciate these words as they are. What a wonderful enlightening product - blended into hope. I stand in awe. A bunch ofs to both of you. Frans
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I really enjoy reading 'she said/he said' specially when the verses blend so well as you guys have done here.
Lovely work both of you!!!
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I was told that I would find some delightful poetry here that would not disappoint and that certainly appears to be the case. A combining of two great minds creating words that flow so masterfully. You have done a lovely job here, both of you.
~Midnight Lace~
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This flows so effortless and flawless. What a masterful job you have both managed to pull off here. Bravo!
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I have never attempted a collaboration but it never ceases to amaze me how some people's thoughts just seem to click and mesh so well just as yours do here. I like the conversational flow going on here. It's different and adds a uniqueness to the poem. Well done poets.
~JLG
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I adore the playful conversation going back and forth between the two seperate entities here. I can picture this scene perfectly within my mind. You have certainly brought this piece to life... with a little help from a friend I see. You both get accolades from me, that's for certain.
Just A TXCowgirl
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A wonderful, wonderful collaboration! I love the closing stanza. It had my heart soaring. Each line added greater positivity than the one before and that held a powerful appeal for me. Kudos to you both for such a divine piece. I hope we see more on the horizon soon.
♥ Touchof1der
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Wondrous work!
Bravo! I am hoping for many more collaborations from you two, Leo. Thank you for sharing hope and love in such compassionate way, Poets.
Love
Myra
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The two of you have written a captivating poem of life, love and hope. A genuinely seemless write. There is a natural flow between the two that makes the read effortless and full of beauty. The image that is painted here is not an image meant for the mind but one that is painted for the heart. This fills you, expands the senses. A true pleasure to read.
~Michelle~
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