In the presence of a glowing sunset,
father and son enjoy a fishing trip.
They share a special bond this evening,
taking turns throwing the line
out into unknown water.
Father teaches his son how to reel it back in,
and it takes several tries to get
his cast and reel just right.
Just as the sunset begins to fade
and darkness creeps up on the boys,
the son reels in his first fish.
"Daddy, look! I got one!"
"Yes, son, you sure did," Father replied, smiling.
Author notes
http://www.floridastateparks.org/ameliaisland/images/AMI-fishingfatherandsonatsunset-mar.jpg
I wrote this poem about the above picture.
Kiwikrazi37 (used to be ImmortalCyclone)
My Saturday Write (Write about anything)
A contest entry
- Are you up for a challenge? by innocence jaded.xx.
4200 points, ended September 8, 2008, 72 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What do you think?
Comments
-
I really liked this. It was definitely different, but you wrote it pretty well. My favorite part probably had to be:
-Just as the sunset begins to fade
and darkness creeps up on the boys,
son reels in his first fish.
...
Good lines =) The only problem I see with that is that before "son" there should be "the" or something more possessive, if you know what I mean, so the reader doesn't read it like a robot. lol
Keep it & good luck.
♥
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