Ah, the rising scarlet globe
Garbed in shining golden robe
Bring tear to eye, and gently probe
My memories and thoughts of life.
See, the setting orange sun
Descends, for now its work is done
The battle for day is over and won
Black fingers play the evening fife.
Author notes
I hope the last line doesn't seem random... it makes sense to me, but what the heck. I like this little piece. I think this title doesn't fit, so title ideas please?
A contest entry
- Two Four Line Stanzas - Rhyme and Meter Only by Frodofan.
425 points, ended August 29, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I don't know. The title seems to fit to me.
I don't see anything strange about the finish. I like the rhyme with "life." Too often people try to find a way to work "wife" or "strife" in there when another rhyme altogether would have worked better.
So well done. Thanks for entering. -
ahhh ahhh ahh ah.... WOW!
I loved it i mostly write storys but this ... WOWMAZING! GREAT JOB WOOT WOOT!~Elfstone/Carly -
wow, this is nice, the imagery here was stunning, and the wording was good! i like the flow and all! keep penning!
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loved you comment
it s a very nice commernt i an 11 year old saw love in this poem and beauty you?
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