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Sweet Death

I'll still feel the burning of Failure long after I'm dead in the grave.
I know the stabs of Perfection which cause my will to decay.

And if the darkness of Fear will defeat my gain,then I may as well kill me while some hopes still remain.

Beneath my veneer of compassion cowers a suffering soul,and in my heart a burning anger slowly taking its toll.

I feel the pale chill of Pain as he suffocates the light,through the pieces of panic from losing my life.

Below the surface of my anger lies a festering fear,fed by the resonating hate from every word that I hear.

You bled me dry until I had nothing left,
and my nightmare finally ends as i feel the sweet Release of Death.

A contest entry

what do you like or not like about it?

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Reanna Eryn
    April 5

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    So much to read, so many emotions, I couldn't get enough of this one. Beautiful. I can definately feel the pain this person felt when he/she was about to commit suicide. Ryhme was definately good. On topic and not going over-board. I love this.


  • stargardt13
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    This was a very good poem. I enjoyed your ryhming and all the strong emotions that went into this. You really brought the emotions out in this poem. Thank you for sharing this poem with me and entering it into my contest.


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    February 19

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    All these different emotions will live on after death, as they are your actions from being alive and therefore will live on in those that you have known. People will never forget yours.


  • ToxicSuicide
    January 10

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    This is great! Thank you so much for entering my contest. Good luck! My favorite part was,
    "Below the surface of my anger lies a festering fear,fed by the resonating hate from every word that I hear."
    ~ToxicSuicide.


  • xXCadyBabbiXx
    January 2
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is deep.
    Thank you for entering!


  • Abstract Image
    November 2, 2008

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    wow very nice with bringing the emotions to life and making them into people. I loved that...this was a very writtin poem and i really liked it...good luck.

1 - 6 of 6