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Pulp Fiction

trademark watermarks
pock the decrepit park bench
with telling time stamps

where many words trade places
many more remain unsaid

aeon's derelict
misplaced in lonely firelight
is never ingrained

when a simple sanding block
gently smooths out subtle scars

those frosted windows
that my final breath has been
begin to shudder

the winter solstice
would be such a lovely time
for turning pages

but I am frozen
between the bitter chapters
story still untold

 

 

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 6 of 6
  • unraveled
    October 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Hmmm.... hmmmm... wow. Thought-provoking.
    Lots of imagery in here. I liked it a lot

    Lines like "where many words trade places/ many more remain unsaid" and "I am frozen/ between the bitter chapters/ story still untold" help to shape the tone and subject of the poem, and of course, for that second example, give it a great ending.

    My only complaints are that I don't understand the significance of the title, and the ideas are so heavy and complete on their own that it takes some deep probing to get the meaning.

    Maybe you could explain the title :/ haha
    Thank you for this


  • spazpekker
    August 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    ahh.... the chicken royale buddy
    fresh or frozen
    still kinda needs something to wash it down

    dont go back mate.
    never go back.




  • notorious
    August 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "trademark watermarks"
    Already I love the first line.

    'decrepit' is one helluva bitchin' word. So smooth off one's tongue, & it sounds decrepit for Godsakes. Gotta love a word that sounds like what it means.

    "telling time stamps"
    Nice.

    "many more remain unsaid"
    The line preceding this line is profound, but this is EVEN MORE SO.

    "eon's derelict"
    'eon' is SUCH a cool word...though I like saying/spelling it 'aeon'.

    "misplaced in lonely firelight
    is never ingrained"
    'firelight' is a freaking gorgeous word...'misplaced'...what a sad word choice.

    "when a simple sanding block
    gently smooths out subtle scars"
    It's sad, but with a bit of hope. Strange that you can mess with emotions so in your writing.

    "the winter solstice
    was such a lonely time
    for turning pages"
    'solstice' is SUCH a groovy word. You already used 'lonely' to describe firelight...but meh...sounds good in both instances.

    "that I was frozen
    between the bitter chapters
    story still untold"
    Fucking genius & sad.



  • cheaphotelsign
    August 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    brains splattered on the curtains behind me because once again you have successfully blown my ever-lovin mind...this is like old school good...i mean classic...made me think of o'henry and my favorite stories of his....this is truly marvelous....damn- you are a tasty treat


  • Cannonsfire
    August 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Winter is the time for sanding scars smooth, nothing else we can do when it is cold, although as I head towards Spring I look forward more to warming my skin, have had enough of scrubbing it.

1 - 6 of 6