Change in Time
Night wind brings a newer chill
as breezes gain force
Blazing blossoms flourish still
as love stays on course
Time walks beside our daily strides
as if to befriend
Two lovers riding lazing tides
onward to days end.
A contest entry
- Two Four Line Stanzas - Rhyme and Meter Only by Frodofan.
425 points, ended August 29, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please critique the highs and lows! How does this make you feel? Where does this hit you?
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
Lovely write
This has such a softness to it like a whisper of love in the ear keep up the good work
-
Forgot these
-
Wonderful!
Love a Poet who can rhyme with feeling
Loved the first stnza, yet, the last, is so comforting to my spirit....God bless you!
Bear ~
-
-
Thank you for reading, Bear and for the lovely comment!
-
-
I love simple poems that say a lot with just a little. Something very moving in this collection of thoughts.
-
I would love to know what kind of meter you call this.
-
Really good
I like how the rhythm and Rhyme don't seem forced. besides that, I really like the idea of time being a companion who walks with love day by day. good job. -
Very beautiful. Such a sweet and loving piece. I couldn't see the words but highlighted them. It just looks like a black screen to me?
I love how this is simple, yet conjures up such pretty images. It leaves a little room to think as it's just obscure enough to be clever.
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
