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black coffee

i suck down black coffee
with sheets like snakes -
knotted, overgrown cotton

its late
but i waited for you
to bring me my cup
(because you're sweet when i'm naked)

and later
you'll flatten my hair with your palm
get up with your boxers on
and i'll put your beautiful token
- just one cup of black coffee -
back on the nightstand
and uncoil myself from the bed
 

A contest entry

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

  • luvdrkchocolate
    August 27, 2008

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    Oh. This is a nice little poem that you have going on here. I wrote for this contest too and I found it a great subject to write about. You took a more romantic look at coffee in bed. I thought you did a good job of expressing yourself here.


  • jazzcat gold member
    August 25, 2008

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    This is so simple and so perfect in its execution that it really wows the reader. There is a sweetness to this and a reality that invites the reader in and warms us. Nicely done.


  • Saffron gold member
    August 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I enjoyed this--thank you for writing this for the contest


    Saffron


  • She burns
    August 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Classic!!!