Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Soft Caress

In off-world glow bathed in Time,
Poorly mimicked in a hollow green sea,
She’s fixed on the horizon’s line,
As if heaven bowed her knee.
It seems her light sings a song,
A soft caress in Time’s domain.
It sings of joy, this moon so strong,
Lasting as long as she’ll remain.

It almost seems she’s barely there;
Carefree and whimsical, like a child.
She seems unworried, without care,
A body so fully divinely-styled.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Samplette gold member
    August 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A breath-taking write Mo...so beautifully crafted. It held me captive throughout. Lovely imagery. Best to you in the contest.
    Sam


  • j i n gold member
    August 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    It almost seems she’s barely there;
    Carefree and whimsical, like a child.

    Yes, this is lovely, down to the very last phrase.
    Elusive Moon, where keepest thou? Thank you, I am impressed by the softness, contemplation of it.
    Best wishes and blessings always,
    jin


  • Angelflower
    August 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    This was so wonderful!! I really love how softly this piece was painted.. The imagery was really vivid and beautiful.. You did such a wodnerful job with this write!! I really enjoyed reading this.. Best of luck in the contest..

    Angel


  • Azria
    August 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    Wonderful to read. Touch the sun and you get burnt...touch the moon and it's magical.

  • goalsv
    August 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful discription, soft and calm yet a force in nature. Loved the metephoric flow and poetic verse.


  • Warrior of Peace
    August 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    wow

    so pretty and magnetic. I love it bro. It speak of the beauty of the moon That the lord put there. It reminds of how wonderful the moon is. Keep up the good work.

  • mcheadle
    August 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    The moon can be many things

    to all of us. I like to think God left a light on in case someone wants to call, is lost, is in need of help, or is just looking for a friend...mac

    • j i n gold member
      August 15, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      What a beautiful Comment!

      The moon can be many things
      to all of us. I like to think God left a light on in case someone wants to call, is lost, is in need of help, or is just looking for a friend...mac

      This comment touched me, you have no idea. How lovely, my little girls would love this. We have stars and moons all over their ceiling. Glow in the Dark...really kind of cool!
      Anyway, this was a poem in itself, thank you,
      peace,
      jin

1 - 12 of 12