The living world ends every night.
Closing eyes shut out the light.
Destruction is the loss of sight.
No one believes but I just might.
The world is reborn every day.
Creation is a sun-bourne ray.
The genesis a passion play.
Nothing made is here to stay.
The empty streets of my hometown
where once so many people roamed
are now a death-grin beggar's frown,
a rabid dog's mouth marked with foam.
The echo of a laughing voice,
the memory of crying eyes,
some said truth was just a choice,
but innocence and hope were lies.
Friends and neighbors grinning skulls,
rotted flesh and naked bones.
The corn crib full of empty hulls,
nothing hurts like sticks and stones.
Reaching with an empty hand
which prays for someone's company,
but echoes of a dying land
are the only answer there for me.
The living world of dying dreams,
nothing turns out as it seems.
The laughter and the unheard screams,
the best laid plans are empty schemes.
The rebirth of the living soul,
strip the flesh and make me whole.
Impertinence and thought control,
dancing around the old May pole.
This old house where I was born
has fallen into disrepair.
The pages of the Book were torn.
The tatters tangled in my hair.
The children lain so peacefully,
I tucked them gently in their beds.
The color bled from them to me
as sugar plums danced in their heads.
A thousand tears can't wash away
the ragged edges of my pain.
As I must face another day,
so must the Lord pick chaff from grain.
A fallen light can't memorize
the faces of the love it's known.
The winning hand can't claim it's prize
when it is playing all alone.
Author notes
CHAOS
A contest entry
- Blow me away by LaLaLie.
1144 points, ended September 8, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite-palooza by swim.x.
1650 points, ended October 6, 2008, 101 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rapture by WithoutWings.
500 points, ended September 30, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Let us take on the Domain of HELL....all metaphors welcome! by ears2hearyou.
1200 points, ended November 7, 2008, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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What the title of the poem has to do with the actual poem eluded me. Enjoyable, nonetheless.
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well done.
the title is very interesting, but I dont see how it pertains to the poem.
the poem has a very good rhyme skeme. good job on the rhyming. :]]
it gives the impression that the angel of death went and killed and ruined someone's hometown... that sad.
The world is reborn every day.
Creation is a sun-bourne ray.
The genesis a passion play.
Nothing made is here to stay.
thats my favorite part.^^^
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different
What does this poem have to do with lipstick? I really loved the part about sugar plums dance in their head.
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It was nice to see this one posted. I enjoyed it just as much the second time around. It is a well written piece of poetry.
Mike -
This is So excellent!! Wow you did an outstanding job!!! So much imagery, great detail and description!!! This is beautiful through and through a most colorful write!!! You did a very lovely job!! I love the flow its wonderful!!! Your amazing!!
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"A thousand tears can't wash away
the ragged edges of my pain.
As I must face another day,
so must the Lord pick chaff from grain.
A fallen light can't memorize
the faces of the love it's known.
The winning hand can't claim it's prize
when it is playing all alone."
Tremendous poem, chock full of tragic imagery. I prefer the long stanzas because they contain more imagery, and show more than tell. The first stanza tells more than shows, it seems like a prelude. The rhythm and rhyme are tremendous, and fit the subject of the poem well.
The only line, actually word I question is:
"are the only answer there for me." I don't think you need the word "are".
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Thanks for entering my contest. I enjoyed this greatly. It is eloquent and well written, with a good rhyme scheme as well. Also I find the idea that the world ends every night and is recreated intriguing. No one else so far has gone that direction so good job.
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The echo of a laughing voice,
the memory of crying eyes,
some said truth was just a choice,
but innocence and hope were lies.
Friends and neighbors grinning skulls,
rotted flesh and naked bones.
The corn crib full of empty hulls,
nothing hurts like sticks and stones.
Your ease at rhyme astounds me. It was beautiful and I totally understand where you are coming from. Your constant comparison and contrast between good and bad, normal and evil, sour and sweet, really turned this poem into a masterpiece.
Congratulations and good luck in the contest.
Chin up,
Swim.x -
This is very nicely done. I have read several of your poems that seem to have the same look at the town you moved back to. It reminds me of the short story writer Sherwood Anderson.
Great job.
Mike -
Humbling...
So much pain from a caring heart.
Hope is seen within.
You somehow managed to bring a light into a void.
Absolutely genious.
Feel better my friend...
wolf
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i like this alot. i love the rhyme scheme.
and you chose impeccable words to make it flow correctly...
to be completely bare, to be completely naked and torn apart is the kind of thing only few can relate to. luckily for those that can't relate, they do not know the feeling of complete dispair, at least not in this sense... great write -
Beautiful poem. The repetion and rhyme was on the spot. To top it all off it had a plot that made me want to read more!
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Ah ... now you are where you should be, Poet ...
stripped from all, to stand before the Lord and say: All has become to naught ... Please see my distraught. And let your palms be filled with rays to sow it in the dark of days ...
Love to you.
Myra
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this is another amazing piece of writing my friend...every line vivid with imagery and thought provoking. The religious undertones and apocalyptic connotations make this a very deep and meaningful write for me. Very well done.
Rory
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Wow!
Took two times reading it; I could still have another go to try and grasp the depths of it. Despair indeed! You've nailed the depths of depression, allright!
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Alone, even when all else fails. Darkness of hope and dispair. Cannot claim this prize...alone! Sad when you think so many of us cannot convey our feelings here such as you have. Great penning! ~Sie
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This is a very well written poem. It is is filled with desolate and apocolyptic imagery. I like it alot.
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