cascading over birches,
elms, dogwood and maples.
Icicles borrowed
frozen senses
snowmen, snow-fortress,
play
men's minds.
Snowballs whizz past,
vague distortions
snowy ice.
Frozen fields
enfolded warmth
woolen dress
shapely pursuing,
working/play
riding out
horse-pulled sleigh.
Falling light
feather dust
keeping wonder,
seeping deeper
ethereal years.
Hearts enfolded
etched in snow,
leaves me with
eternal glow.
Author notes
9. Snow fields forever
I was thinking of free-verse but keeping compression in mind
eliminating filler-words trying to capture more imagery.
It is an experiment.
There are a few rhymes that were quite accidental, but which I feel adds to the poem, so I left them in.
A contest entry
- 24 Hour PIF - by Bear - by Arkbear.
500 points, ended August 13, 2008, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Let me know How this makes you feel, what do you think?
Comments
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Excellent
Such a wonderful creation. So very well done. Best of luck in the contest.

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I see your edit.....noted ~
Bear ~
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bravo
Lovely and it conjures so well the cold and snow and the thinking of winters present and past! bravo... bravo...

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Hi Tirrell....long time no see Buddy ~
Comma after birches*.....but, as I told others, I am critiquing these entries, only enjoying your use of the Prompts

horse-pulled*
Deleting Filler Words are a must in nearly everything I write....especially the PO' & SO' Contests.....you did well....however, you have to stay focused on subject and allow your Tone & Flow to enhance your write, even without unnecessary words ~
Nice job Tirrell....good luck and God bless,
Bear ~
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ahhhhhhhhh, this is delightful. once again I love your snowy pen


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Your subtle rhyme only adds to the imagery in my opinion. Visions are the draw allotted via this authors fine examples in description.A well versed piece.






