In these joinings of florid images
you looking through the evanescence
past flighting fears
and past swords gone awry
looking at me above you
over a skyward hallway
some vertical
reeling
trying to descend it towards you
trying to brush your hand
until I was being pushed up a reverse
of my ascendance
of the flouted hallway
discarded high from you
to a narrow terr
looking down this paneway
Had I thought
how could you
who was so high above me
still be below me
I wouldn't have worried long
because I who was always
reaching
stretching
pushing
pulling
to touch your hand
was no longer
I was falling for you
now always falling
rising in my heart
in my chest and beyond
to where it crevasted against my neck
beating sordidly and chocking me
Now smashed through
I dreamed I was back up there
you with me
we were smiling as we towered
calm beings alone
in these rare viles of sentiencia
A contest entry
- Marry Me? by luna-midnight.
1000 points, ended August 18, 2008, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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I like the how the rhythms match the action and morph into feeling. I also find interesting the abrupt thought changes mid-sentence and the disconcerting use of words. It seems to add to the feeling and danger of flying.
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awww, this was a lovely thought, thank so much for sharing and entering my contest, take care
Stephanie ♥
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