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A New Years Rebirth

Missing image

Candlesticks sink in chocolate ice-cream cake, 

dreams of yesteryears drift through tomorrows 

A new vision dawns when you do awake,

birth's morning you'll feel like a blooming rose

 

Light shines inside your pure heart deep within,

as thoughts you jot bestow so much beauty

Make that sweet wish before the candles dim,

precious moments on wings soaring freely

 

Candle wax rests inside a paper box,

icing melts around the end of the tips

The clock strikes twelve with some ticks and some tocks,

off in the night floats your twenty four ships

 

One ship comes back for you to sail away,

The twenty fifth ship sings, "Happy Rebirth Day!"

Author notes

May you enjoy yourself on this special day! -hugs- my friend!
Pic credit. http://flickr.com/photos/simplyembellish/2624336094/

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14
  • siahaan
    March 20
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  • penman gold member
    September 4, 2008
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    Excellent

    A terrific offering. So very well crafted. Congrats on the honorable mention


  • peridotPixi
    August 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    thank you for the wonderful entry to my contest, i love the way this poem is about ships sailing away and how that 24 ships have sailed away and along came the 25th, Thank you for thaking the time to enter my contest keep up the writing, ~Amy

  • poeticpieces
    August 17, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Happy Birthday!

    You touch the hearts of many Dad!
    Another awesome tribute.

    Your son, Timothy Jr.


  • Stardust-luvr
    August 16, 2008

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    awesome job my dear one as this placed a well needed smile upon my spirit. you are so wonderfully versatile in you galant repretoire of writes. well done many loving blessings always xxxx


  • Lady Ireland gold member
    August 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You are the best at these birhday poems Timothy,
    i can recall the one you did for me.
    Like mine this flowed without a flaw and i bet that whoever you did this for will just re-read it over and over again like i did.
    Slán
    Dlores xx


  • Wandika gold member
    August 11, 2008
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    Very Descriptive

    and well written poem Timothy. What a nice birthday poem for this young person.

    Jim


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    August 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh how beautiful You made a time when some people can feel so down into a time of rejoicing Wonderfully done
    All the best with this.
    gaylene


  • jazzcat gold member
    August 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I think the middle two stanzas really make this work. I like the whole piece, but the middle just tied everything together so well and solidified the tone. Well done

  • written-in-ink
    August 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i can picture the candles sinking as i read the first line...

    i can just picture everything you talk about.

    i think that i like the 2nd stanza the best

  • IansCyberspace silver member
    August 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    I liked it!

    I found "dreams of yesteryears drift through tomorrows" a great description of the interplay between introspection and hope for the future. The ending, as already stated, was cleverly crafted.

    . Rewarded 4


  • Angelflower
    August 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Oh this was really cute and so very sweet of you to do.. I really loved the emotions here in this write you did such a wonderful job.. And I'm sure that she will love this..


    Angel

  • Aesthete2000 gold member
    August 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ah, Timothy, you exude love and charm,
    and, of course, creativity, as you
    conjure up the twenty-four ships,
    with the twenty-fifth singing
    a birthday song!!!Clever and sweet!

    Aesthete


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    August 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Well done here honey.
    Great job and best wishes
    in the contest.

    Love you
    Passions

1 - 14 of 14