My fine, soft hands are pallid,
Limp hangs my long, grey hair,
My rose-red lips are withered,
Outside, no more I’m fair.
I’ve had my time once over,
I’ve seen my children grow;
Watched their children blossom,
Seen love and joy free-flow.
I sit like ancient statue,
From window I now gaze,
Smiling at my garden,
In its tranquil haze.
The children come to play now,
I see their flaxen locks,
They laugh and smile and pick for me
The garden’s hollyhocks.
And as the sunshine glistens,
Upon each bush, each tree,
A cool, sweet breeze wafts over,
Gently caressing me.
It smells like summer roses,
Warm bread from oven new,
Like sea salt and adventure,
Like silver morning dew.
And memories come rushing,
Bounding through my mind,
From times of old, when I was young,
Our lips softly entwined.
We’d watched the glowing sunset,
From the beach’s shore,
Made undying vows of love,
Warming to the core.
Yours arms you held about me,
Your lips came to my hair,
You said your love would always last,
Of that I’m now aware.
And now as I do sit here,
Watching the children play,
Wonder; would you still feel the same,
Though I’m old and grey?
If you had remained at home,
Warm, your hands on me,
Now would you have stood by my side,
And lived, new life to see?
I guess I shall not ever know,
Until there comes the time,
When my time on earth is done,
I step across the line.
My fine, soft hands are pallid,
Limp hangs my long, grey hair,
My rose-red lips are withered,
Outside, no more I’m fair.
I’ve had my time once over,
I’ve seen my children grow;
Watched their children blossom,
Seen love and joy free-flow.
Yet now I softly close my eyes,
And drift away from here,
I feel your love cast down on me,
Your beating heart is near.
Now once more, my lips are red,
My hands are soft and white,
My greyest hair has turned to gold,
I feel true love’s great might.
Sweetly, sweetly, I shall rise,
My heart burning and true,
Far up, I’ll rise, now heaven-bound,
To seek new life with you.
Limp hangs my long, grey hair,
My rose-red lips are withered,
Outside, no more I’m fair.
I’ve had my time once over,
I’ve seen my children grow;
Watched their children blossom,
Seen love and joy free-flow.
I sit like ancient statue,
From window I now gaze,
Smiling at my garden,
In its tranquil haze.
The children come to play now,
I see their flaxen locks,
They laugh and smile and pick for me
The garden’s hollyhocks.
And as the sunshine glistens,
Upon each bush, each tree,
A cool, sweet breeze wafts over,
Gently caressing me.
It smells like summer roses,
Warm bread from oven new,
Like sea salt and adventure,
Like silver morning dew.
And memories come rushing,
Bounding through my mind,
From times of old, when I was young,
Our lips softly entwined.
We’d watched the glowing sunset,
From the beach’s shore,
Made undying vows of love,
Warming to the core.
Yours arms you held about me,
Your lips came to my hair,
You said your love would always last,
Of that I’m now aware.
And now as I do sit here,
Watching the children play,
Wonder; would you still feel the same,
Though I’m old and grey?
If you had remained at home,
Warm, your hands on me,
Now would you have stood by my side,
And lived, new life to see?
I guess I shall not ever know,
Until there comes the time,
When my time on earth is done,
I step across the line.
My fine, soft hands are pallid,
Limp hangs my long, grey hair,
My rose-red lips are withered,
Outside, no more I’m fair.
I’ve had my time once over,
I’ve seen my children grow;
Watched their children blossom,
Seen love and joy free-flow.
Yet now I softly close my eyes,
And drift away from here,
I feel your love cast down on me,
Your beating heart is near.
Now once more, my lips are red,
My hands are soft and white,
My greyest hair has turned to gold,
I feel true love’s great might.
Sweetly, sweetly, I shall rise,
My heart burning and true,
Far up, I’ll rise, now heaven-bound,
To seek new life with you.
A contest entry
- WHY when i love??? by offlimits.
450 points, ended September 4, 2008, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hopeless Romantics by N.W. Clerk.
1200 points, ended September 6, 2008, 39 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Jeff's first year by cricketjeff.
4620 points, ended October 5, 2008, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Curse of Passion by Sokarjo.
1200 points, ended December 15, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pumpkin Pie by GypsyEyes.
400 points, ended December 22, 2008, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Romantic Pre-Writes by poets whisper.
700 points, ended December 13, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - LOVE IS IN THE AIR! by Auburn Sunrise.
2000 points, ended February 15, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Girl, seriously. I'm impressed. Beyond impressed.
15 years old and you had the foresight to write something this mature, this deep? Not only the subject matter but the style and imagery.
You had a couple of spots where the flow was a little tough, especially the first two lines of stanza 3. You may want to word that as:
"I sit like an ancient statue,
From the window I now gaze"
Otherwise, this was spectacular. Depressing, mind you, but spectacular. Reminds me of "The Notebook" a bit.
Thanks for entering!

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Thank you for such a thoughtful & kind comment! It's made my day

I'll look over the rougher areas - thanks for pointing them out!
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Wow! What a...
Sweet poem! With beautiful imagery, truely a wonderful poem.

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Aww thank you!

Merry Xmas!
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So sweet
This is so tender and sweet. I usually hate poems like this but this is wonderful. How we all long to have that one true love that we can remember when we are old and grey...great write!!!! -
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Thank you!
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OMG!
This is soooooo amazing! It flows wonderfully and the rhyming is incredible! I absolutely love it. You are undoubtably a true poet. Thank you for sharing this. I'm just speechless!

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Aww thank you Candi!
I'm so glad you like it, you are such a sweet person, thank you once again
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Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful! I've really tried making this fit the contest in my mind, but have failed. And what sadness! Such a beautiful, heartfelt, emotional piece deserves quite a number of little yellow clappy men. I hope that will suffice. Thank you so much for entering my contest! :-)


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Oh my....Oooooh my, my, my! This is nothing short of divine Blue. You spared no expense when penning this masterpiece. This is like ice cream made from swiss chocolate; scrumptious! Oh my beautiful young friend...you truly have a gift...a gift to rival even me!
I bow to you, out of respect...young poetess.
love always and serenity to you,
Ocean.

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Thankyou, dear Ocean, from the very bottom of my heart.
I bow to you now, dear friend
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divine!
i can barley find the words to describe how purely divine this is! when i was reading this, i was sure you were some award winning poet who everyone knows the name of. and if not, you should be! your words are so powerful and i absolutly adore it.


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wow, thank you!
aww so sweet of you to say that, i am honoured by your praise.
thanks once again, such a lovely comment
have a nice day
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Thankyou Grandma
your kind words always lift my spirit up and make me smile!
Love,
Summer xxx -
Oh my, dear grand daughter, I shiver with this poem...It has such a powerful mood and words...You have done well in the rhyming and carrying the mood of this dear lady right to the very end...A very spiritual tone here that can't be ignored, and a masterpiece hon....Bravo for the write!


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Lovely romantic verse in English Hymn measure, thank-y ou for the read and for the entry in my contest. Unfortunately the contest required a pair of poems, a pre-write and a fresh write, since youi only entered the one I cannot consider your entry for the finals, thanks again
Jeff

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This was so beautiful and the words just seem to flow really well. Definitely worthy of gold, congratulations.


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this is so beautiful
thank you this is so beautiful
good lick with the contest -
amen..what a heart touching thought you are herewith with a sentiment of love..wonderful indeed...tahnks for sharing it with me...
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wow katie thats amazing. its beautiful. the flow is great and i completely love this poem. woa.
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