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Entanglement



underneath the stars
our lonely hearts beat as one;
the dawn comes too soon.

Author notes

five syllables
seven syllables
five syllables

Whatever you want to say. Critiques, anything. :)

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Comments


  • Foxydaze14
    August 11, 2008

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    The point of this kind of poem is to give off an image. I think you gave one but I felt more emotion than imagery. Scoring: creativity 10-wording 15-structure 10-emotion 20: 55


  • aanika
    August 11, 2008

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    ooooh I like this!
    and I usually don't like form poetry.
    but this is just so damn pretty