Hair fell from her limbs in the breath of fire,
pomegranate at her feet burst, spilling wine,
bathing her feet deep, penetrating her roots
Unrequitted, arms asp, reaching for Heaven's oasis,
as lullabies swoon in the niche of her nook,
whispered songs ricochet from within her cradle
Scents of lilac lumbar in satchels of her loin,
fountains of dew befallen from the heel of clouds,
like dust of stars sprinkled on royalty's shroud
Her love affair with vanity whistle clarinet odes,
alone she stand in sawdust pools, weeping of joy,
seeded in warmth of moss, beside forgotten springs
Author notes
Prompt... Picture Prompt (40-100 words)
Artist Unknown
A contest entry
- Beautiful Picture Prompt; Semi-Quickie by perfectsunset.
475 points, ended August 14, 2008, 14 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Wow; this was purely amazing. The language in this was brilliant and you created such beautiful imagery and metaphor. Love how the title of your poem is the word spelled out with the first letter of each stanza. This just left me breathless. It was exactly what I was looking for and then some. You penned a masterpiece.
Best of luck & thanks for entering
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Great poem!!! This is so filled with imagination and imagery!!! I really enjoyed this poem... Thank you for sharing.... Best wishes in this contest!!!!
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Very wonderful Acrostic..
The imagery is really wonderful.. I'm really amazed with this piece it's soft and smooth.. You did such a wonderful job.. Best of luck in the contest..
Angel
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Considering the pic (a nice nature snapshot, but nothing that would invoke deep thoughts, at least not to me), this was brilliantly done.
Although...I do think you abused adverbs a little bit with all the "her's" & "she's". A couple of mentions would be sufficient to let the reader know.
Throughout the poem, I am undecided whether the trees are the "her" being personified, or if it's some unknown character not depicted in the picture.
"in the breath of fire"
NICE. It's so...imagery-infused.
You use a lot of words that refer to the trees that lead me to believe you are personifying them...e.g. roots, moss, etc., etc.
"niche of her nook"
Groovy phrase, but an example of how you didn't need to you use so many 'her's in the poem.
"forgotten springs"
Gorgeous!
Good luck
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