Her life never worked out the way she planned
This was not part of her dreams
Living a lie
Pretending things are fine
While a black hole opened at her feet
High school went far too quickly
But the tortures go slow-mo through her mind
She never had problems making friends
But became more distant with every bitchy betrayal
She met the boy of her dreams
He told her he loved her too
Her world was becoming worthwhile
Then he shattered her heart into two
She felt trapped within a cage
Everyone telling her what to do
She didn't know who she was anymore
She convinced herself she should simply disappear
After a suicide attempt
She was released from the hospital
But within her dark, black world
There was a faraway faint star
And she promised herself she would reach it
No matter what it took
This was not part of her dreams
Living a lie
Pretending things are fine
While a black hole opened at her feet
High school went far too quickly
But the tortures go slow-mo through her mind
She never had problems making friends
But became more distant with every bitchy betrayal
She met the boy of her dreams
He told her he loved her too
Her world was becoming worthwhile
Then he shattered her heart into two
She felt trapped within a cage
Everyone telling her what to do
She didn't know who she was anymore
She convinced herself she should simply disappear
After a suicide attempt
She was released from the hospital
But within her dark, black world
There was a faraway faint star
And she promised herself she would reach it
No matter what it took
Author notes
written while thinking of my favorite quote
"When it's dark enough you can see the stars"
A contest entry
- Give me something origional by SouthernDownpour.
1183 points, ended August 12, 2008, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Why Not? by Hebz.
395 points, ended August 24, 2008, 54 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Wow, cool quote & great poem.
Thnx for entering & Best of Luck
: F
GloriousGift
Heba -
Wow, this poem is really powerful in its content - Really enjoyed every line of this one. I think a lot of of know someone like the person in which you're speaking of, so it's personal even though we weren't the ones to write it. Like the flare of hope displayed at the end, and as for the quote in your author's notes: Beautiful! I see why it inspired you so. I had actually never heard it, but it's great.


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splended!
Those early pre adult years it does seem they are the hardest to understand and go through, to find that light in a very dark time is awesome for you,
Very well written
Rend the Veil

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awe this was great. a heartfelt write. I love that quote by the way. this couldnt have done it more justice. <3
"She felt trapped within a cage
Everyone telling her what to do
She didn't know who she was anymore
She convinced herself she should simply disappear"
good stuff
good luck in the contest hun this was great

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loved that end..the first bit of the poem was very dark and the last one is so sweet.
Your poem is wonderful
Good luck in the contest.
Thank you.
1 - 5 of 5





