I tread beneath shallow
waters that run through the
depth of my empty soul.
Awaiting the transformation
of grace on lofty hills of hope.
Suspended like floating swans
drifting in brilliance
of daylight.
Submerged in beguiling
thoughts of wonder.
Topsy-turvy in a realm
of melancholy smiles.
A contest entry
- I hope I never feel this... by Cannonsfire.
1750 points, ended August 21, 2008, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Really well written piece and a great submission for the contest (best of luck in that.) Paints a vivid picture of emotions that are often hard to describe.
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It's like you are lost, empty and wandering aimlessly about. Excellent write and I enjoyed the read....
novy
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C
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Wow, this really conveys a sense of emptiness and drifting... nice illustration of complex emotions!
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Brilliant!!
Dude...the first part, "I tread beneath shallow waters that run through the depth of my empty soul," is extrememly intense. I saw that this was a contest entry called "I hope I Never Feel This." I think that based on the first part alone you should win this. This is something that is profoundly deep and emotional. I know that I hope I never feel that...such sorrow and emptiness. This was incredible. Good luck in the contest. I hope you win!!
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Topsy-turvy in a realm
of melancholy smiles
A perfect ending to a wonderful poem. well done!
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this feels like a soft, lovely and adorable piece.
Cute, I smiled at most of what I read.
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