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I love you

 

 

I am a shadow

a creature deep in thought

 

a mentor to some

an enigma of sort

 

A man of new moments

an original sin

 

A menace of wonder

a manical sick grin

 

and still I love

with each tattooed breath

 

with each sickend sentence

of eventual death

 

I love each moment

each second we talk

 

each endless moment

each rain soaked walk

 

I love with everything

each beat of my heart

 

I love to the finish

I loved from the start

 

So here I stand

with my head held high

 

Saying I love you

until the day I die...

 

 

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 25 of 25

  • ronnica
    December 21, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Just perfect, and most enjoyed the read.
    I think you could manage with manic , re manical


  • BabyBun silver member
    November 3, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Brilliance on a page. I love it - best of luck


  • DawnKestrel
    October 31, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I like your rhyme in this poem. Good luck in my contest.


  • Erica Carnea
    October 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    congrats on silver
    love always
    erica
    xx


  • Leonura
    October 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful words that truly speak of heartfelt emotions. wonderfully written.


  • Flowergirl
    September 27, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    this is outstanding i loved it keep up the great work very nice,.....


  • ariazephyrzoe gold member
    September 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    a mentor to some
    an enigma of sort

    I love these

    but Wow! This is amazing...infused with tamed and untamed emotions.

    Anna Lee


  • misshugglebugglez
    September 21, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    just gorgeous and outstandin'

    wow, this was really good! i like it! i like your rhyming skills! wonderful poem!!!!!!!!! hugglez!
    -pb fudge


    • Unsigned gold member
      September 21, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks PBF...it is how I am and this is basically me!


  • Rele anmwe
    September 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Bravo!!!!!!

    Now, this is very beautiful. I love the flow, you are quite a charmer too. I think this is very straight forward and it nails the coffin pretty well. Thank you for sharing, may you have a magnificence day


  • Valley Girl silver member
    August 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! Such a beautiful and creative write. It is such a great feeling to both love and to be loved. I think that you have really captured the prompt with this. Congrats on the well deserved Silver. ♥


  • LadyDementia gold member
    August 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    Congrats on the silver!

    'tattooed breath' very creative, wicked imagery! Such a darkly beautiful piece hun, stunningly penned! Congrats on the silver


  • Sprite silver member
    August 24, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice write. The ending was perfect. We are all imperfect and the trick is in finding someone who loves us for those imperfections as well as our strengths.
    ~ Joyce


  • Riftkin gold member
    August 24, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Congrats love on your silver trophy for this.

    Your Lady,

    Riftkin

    ~walks without fear in the shadows to your side~


  • Margaret Denham gold member
    August 23, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful words of love written with the simple and honest thoughts of someone with deeply held feelings.

    Thank you for your entry and best wishes in the judging.

    Love Margaret


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    August 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful Si! To love fully is a wonderful thing and you have penned that here.. an open heart, despite being a bit of an enigma!

    Love it!


  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    August 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Si Si ....

    ♥ well done with this hunii
    as said before - everyone should try to love like this,

    "and still I love
    with each tattoed breath"

    enjoyed those lines [psssst you're missing an 'o']
    & guess what I even enjoyed the rhyme
    thanks for sharing MR "menace of wonder"

    luffz ya Si

    Tasha


  • Unconscious-Energy
    August 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very deep my brother....I am so in love with your sensitive side......It should come out more often. A mentor to some, an enigma of sort........

    fantastic..


  • StarEyes
    August 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What a wonderful take on the prompt my brother! This is fantastic! You did great here! But then I knew you would too! You always do!

    Best of luck in this contest!

    Ek is lief vir jou altyd

    Nyetta


  • BuriedTreasures silver member
    August 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Wow --very profound and interesting composition well versed with good flow of the rhyming verse!
    Favorite are the concluding lines--

    "So here I stand
    with my head held high
    Saying I love you
    until the day I die..."

    Well done & Best of luck in the contest!


  • Rose Dark Thorn silver member
    August 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully penned, my dear intuitive reflection...Every human being should try to love in this way...the world might be a better place if they did.


  • luna-midnight gold member
    August 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    awww this is sooo sweet daddy, lovely flow, and just aww...powerful ending. lucky lady
    take care, and good luck
    Stephanie ♥

  • Riftkin gold member
    August 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Love is strong
    and it comes from the heart

    Till the end of time
    if it was there from the start

    Holding hands
    for long walks

    Speaking and listening
    as each other talks

    Being there through
    troubles at hand

    Very tall
    and making a stand


    My love is there
    for you

    No matter
    what you do

1 - 25 of 25