The azure skies of the dark planet
Bear poison fumes that lead to asphyxiation.
A carmine blossom grows on its black hills,
Releasing spores that cause a deadly disease.
Dilapidated buildings dot the cold landscape;
Sad remnants from the displaced population.
Delusions of heroism infected their minds
As they attempted to settle this enigmatic world.
Their hopes are now forsaken
After the grotesque error of their dream
Of trying to live in harmony
With an isolated and alien form of Nature.
Their hearts are all jaded,
For they had been kindred spirits in adventure.
They now loathe their former passion,
For their memoir is filled with the deaths of loved ones.
Malicious thoughts trouble their minds
As they find all their former goals nauseating.
They see their entire future through an opaque lense
And can find no remedy to their emotional agony.
Upon reflection, they realize
That the requiem of their families
Was caused by the sparkle of glory in their eyes,
Which now feel like painful scabs.
Lost seraphim sing over this doomed planet
As the last tattered life forms
Depart from the dwellings of the underprivileged,
While the few who remain verge on Death's door.
Their thoughts are vacuous
As they waste away
And yearn for the life
That only the zealous can contemplate.
Author notes
The words I used:
1. Azure
2. Poison
3. Asphyxiation
4. Carmine
5. Blossom
6. Disease
7. Dilapidated
8. Displaced
9. Delusions
10. Enigmatic
11. Forsaken
12. Grotesque
13. Harmony
14. Isolated
15. Jaded
16. Kindred
17. Loathe
18. Memoir
19. Malicious
20. Nauseating
21. Opaque
22. Remedy
23. Reflection
24. Requiem
25. Sparkle
26. Scabs
27. Seraphim
28. Tattered
29. Underprivileged
30. Verge
31. Vacuous
32. Waste
33. Yearn
34. Zealous
A contest entry
- Lost in Darkness by Victoria of Aragon.
1050 points, ended August 20, 2008, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
Dearest poet, I believe you have quite literally stunned me with this work. I can't be certain, but I know you've used most - if not all - of the words in your poem, and it hardly seems forced. I can't find one stanza that seemed forced, actually. Well done!
The imagery is also spellbinding. Upon my first read of this, I thought that it could have perhaps been about the Europeans who first came to the Americas. I'm not sure if this is what you were going for, but that's what I got out of it.
Over all, a wonderfully dazzling piece, my dear. Thank you so very much for entering, and know that my Muse is quite pleased with your work. -
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Dear Victoria:
Thank you for your beautiful comment. I was very happy when I first read it and would have responded right away if the reply tab had been available the other times I viewed this page. Thank you also for the silver award; I greatly appreciate it! Your contest brought my muse back as well, for this was the first poem I had written in more than a year. I wish you the best of luck in all your future endeavors!
~Charles~
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