Ashtray trashcan sits.
The speckled, chewed gum design
shows nothing but truth.
A contest entry
- High School: Rules, Fools & Tools by Sorath.
600 points, ended August 22, 2008, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Haiku's Here! by Age of Rain.
750 points, ended August 15, 2008, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Any comments are appreciated.
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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i gotta work on haikus... this is a great one to read and learn from
i like it
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An excellent haiku.
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Thanks for the entry! Yeah a trashcan does depict school life, tehehe. I loved it how your words can have so many takes on it. It's actually quite mind boggling how to take that last line.
Thanks for the entry & good luck!
Sorath -
I love the last line.
I also love the first line, there's some repetition of "ash" there and it sounds really good.
'speckled, chewed gum design' is also great. -
Such an evocative write that really encapsulates the reality of your location. Appropriate descriptive detail and choice of words. I liked this, thanks for sharing. Cheers.
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i love that last line. there are so many other things outside of a high school to write about. but only this speaks so honestly about everyday life. it just seems so real.
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should really have reference to a season or emotion. It's really nice, but only haiku by form not content. Really like it though, tough form to write. Well done
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I love the picture that was created with the first two lines, brought back memories of high-school (not necessarily good memories lol.) Not really sure what the last line refers to, I'd love if you could fill me in. Love the color of the backdrop which is the kind of pretty ugly color that goes well with some of my memories from high-school.
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i love it <3
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